Instead try this: Say “What?” And stare at them. Wait for them to explain. Act as though you do not know what a sneeze is. Allow them to explain the process of a sneeze. Tell them you have never experienced that in your life. Wait for them to get exasperated then in a dismissive way mention that you aren’t sure you believe them, and change the subject.
Congratulations, you have won this interaction.
The ol’ smooth shark maneuver
In Dutch you can say “you sneezed”
Wow, I’ve never heard anybody say that; is that a regional thing? Just like “Je niest” and that’s the response?
U niest
-bedankt voor de attentie
(the response is not quite as standard as the first line)
So the expected response in Dutch is to just tell someone they sneezed?
I usually go with “None of that”
I always ‘shhhh’ like a librarian would
I always tell my partner to cut it out when they sneeze.
Sneezing isn’t normal, I never sneeze
Ew
Yuk
I prefer the simple “Curse you.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch that.” - in a Siri voice “Nah, I’m good, thanks though.” “Dude! You scared the crap outta me!”
Sneezing isn’t normal! I never sneeze.
I sneeze multiple times daily whenever I go outside because of ACHOO Syndrome (yes that is a real name lol)
That was hilarious. Gonna have to check out their podcast.
I like to say “acknowledged!” like Picard
Steady…
“I’m going to sneeze.”
“Make it so!”
“You may fire when ready.”
“fire at Will.”
His name is spelled with one “l”; “Wil”
(He’ll probably block me for that, if he’s on Lemmy)
People who intentionally yell when they sneeze can fuck off.
It feels very good, like physically itches the inside back of my throat (amazing if you’re having an allergic response to something), while being deeply psychologically satisfying to yell from your abdomen. I try to only do it at home, but there’s a reason some people scream-sneeze.
I vocalize pretty loudly when I sneeze and it’s entirely involuntary. I hate that I do it and I’ve tried to force myself to stop and it doesn’t work.
“Heard, chef”
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“Fucking grow up.”