If there is a spell capable of breaking down things into its basic raw elements, that would be it.
Garbage is abundant, as well as junk.
Imagine deconstructing anything back to its basic elements and then sell it. A gigantic pile of mixed junk instantly deconstructed and turned into ingots of pure metals, carbon, and other elements.
Not only profitable but helpful to the environment. Convert that floating mass of garbage in the Pacific and you’re set for life.
Instantly buy the largest swat of land I can amass and have it turned into the planets largest wild life preserve.
Source of income: observation tours and nature escapes in full eco villages. Max occupation: 50. Max number of villages: one per 100 square kilometer.
Free access to scientists and wildlife reseaechers.
Security: enforced by snipers.
Plan 1: Raulothim’s Psychic Lance. By the time I get to take that spell, I must have had at least one ASI so I’ll just take metamagic adept for subtle spell. I just have to know the name of the target and be within 120 feet of them (240 if the second metamagic option I take is distant spell), and it’s pretty close to a guaranteed kill vs. a commoner, no murder weapon, and nothing showing that I was there.
Plan 2: Clone. Claim that it’s some revolutionary stem cell rejuvenation therapy and sell it to the super-rich. (Though I might make it fail accidentally if it’s someone like Murdoch or Kissinger. Payment in advance, no guarantees, and I’ll do it on international waters.)
Teleport from children’s hospital to children’s hospital casting heal.
DM says no
Fine raise the dead.
True Polymorph is the easiest if we just wanna accrue wealth quickly
Buy some live feeder mice (a small animal that doesn’t involve killing someone’s pet) and transform them into jewelry. True Polymorph has none of the restrictions of Fabricate, so we can create fine jewelry without skill. Turn a mouse into a gold ring or necklace, with a large gemstone embedded into it. Sell it at a pawn shop. Repeat, use different pawn shops, and use Dominate Person with Modify Memory afterwards if theres some law about needing an ID. The dominated person can use theirs, and then you remove the interaction from their memories.
Sell fine jewelry made from mice all you want. Use that cash to buy cows or other massive animals, turn them into gold. We don’t have to worry about how to pass the gold off though, the goal was to accumulate wealth. Use Fabricate to make the cow-gold into rough coins, build a secret dragon’s den.
Of course, if we’re willing to be a little less subtle, True Polymorph is also great for doing some light faith healing, restoring blindness due to injury by transforming them into another person that’s basically identical, or we could make people look like their ideal selves. Not in the bounds of the question though.
True Polymorph still has a duration. Fabricate needs skill with tools… not necessarily in creating the objects being Fabricated… but it does permanently transform stuff into other stuff.
True Polymorph’s duration is “until dispelled” if you concentrate for an hour. (That’s hidden in the spell description.)
So what happens if you turn a cow into gold, machine that gold into things, then cast dispel magic?
Beef jewelry?
Mending, open a phone repair business. People would just think I’m really good at my job!
Also: Borrowed Knowledge + Fabricate
So does nobody read the spell description for Mending, or…
This spell repairs a single break or tear in an object you touch, such as broken chain link, two halves of a broken key
How many people are neatly snapping their phone into two halves?
A single broken solder joint on a board sounds like it qualifies.
Suggestion. And then go to Wall Street :)
oh I like you.
Not very experienced, but I’d probably True Polymorph dirt/Steve Huffman into some gold and sell it.
Foresight and gambling
Nah win too much and you get kicked out and banned. No matter if you cheated to win or not
They can ban me as long as I’m paid
All it takes is one big win on their jackpot machine. Nothing sus about that.
Big win on a slot is a couple hundred grand pre-tax. Not that great, even hitting the major companies until banned from all will get you in the low millions pre-tax
Not lifelong money there
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Learn charm
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Use it to get hired as the pastor of a megachurch
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Use it on the congregation
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Wish is an easy one, since it can be used to cast most of the other spells talked about here
Clone, immortality without any of the normal downsides (I can choose to die still and don’t need souls or any bs like that)
Identify and go pawn shop hunting and the like
Really most divination spells would be solid for stock market manipulation
Enchantment spells for manipulating the corporate ladder, or getting into politics or something (mass suggestion in the really any political nexus, geus for more targeted things, modify memory, etc).
Healing and revivification spells and sell my services to the elite, bring back the dead, speak to loved ones, etc. Clone works well here too, especially since it has age manipulation.
Not the richest fastest but probably nice and discreet: electronics repair shop using mending.
You can’t mend to fix magic smoke problems. Though it would be awesome to run your finger along a cracked screen to repair it
Why not?
They’re making a joke, riffing off the “you let the magic smoke out” joke used in hardware repair. The “magic smoke” is when the chip fries and needs to be replaced, and mending can only physically repair magic items.
I think you would be able to
You can fix constructs and magical items with it, you can’t put magic back into it though
Lawful Good:
Foresight to convince the smart, powerful people that they’re making bad decisions, influence them to make better decisions for the world, only use it for enough personal gain to sustain a decent living.
Neutral Good:
Mass Suggestion Convince the dumb powerful people I’m a divine being and they better do as I say, use this power to force positive change amongst the easiest to control masses. Collection plates at churches now go to me.
Chaotic Good:
Gate, Use teleportation to extort billionaires by witnessing their depravity and threatening them with exposure, also portal tech. become Rick Sanchez. Rob swiss banks for fun and profit.
Lawful Evil:
Meteor Swarm: Hold cities hostage for ransom.
Chaotic Evil:
True Polymorph: I’m going to start turning politicians into lizards. For cash I’ll turn random shit into itself but but made out of a different material and auction if off, passing myself off as a great artist of incredible talent.
Edit because I forgot about the money half way through.
Edit because I forgot about the money half way through.
It’s not about the money, it’s about sending a lizard.
I like how as you descend into evil and madness you increasingly discard the “don’t draw attention to yourself” part and with chaotic evil the wealth generation aspect is pretty much forgotten. The progression feels right.
But the politicians are already lizard people. You can’t turn them into lizards if they’re already lizards!
You mixed up ‘chaotic evil’ and ‘chaotic good’
I’m torn between targeting just the worst world leaders or targeting them at random. The end goal would be making every politician understand that a mysterious force WILL turn you into a lizard if you displease it. There will be no indication of what displeases the mysterious force.
If you do it randomly they will all understand that the problem is ‘world leaders’ if you do it based on a ranking system you will have ones who think they are one of the ‘good ones’ and so safe.
You could get some great use out of fabricate and proficiency in something related to computer architecture.
Legend Lore could equally grant you valuable knowledge to sell, and similarly half the divination spells could make you a very successful gambler.
Astral Projection head to America set up an evangelic church
Mage hand and offer ghost handjobs for $1000 per person per handjob
Doesn’t really sound like it wouldn’t draw attention
Who would want to admit that they used their services?
Me. I would. Sounds dope.
(Hi, yes, it’s been 5 months and I felt compelled to write this.)