You burn about 21 calories during sex.
Not the way I do it!
(I burn 1 calorie)
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Thatsthejoke TM
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What am I missing here? Why “not my family?” Did they mean like “oh no, not my family! How embarrassing for them to see!” It just reads really strange.
It’s a newer type of phrase/way to start a sentence. It’s kind of like a way to call attention to or put extra emphasis on the action taking place.
For example, say I got to an ice cream store and try 10 flavors. I could say “not me trying every flavor before getting a single scoop.”
It kinda adds a sarcastic or lightheated feel to the sentence.
Ahhhh thanks for the explanation!
I like your ice cream example, but I’m going to be an old man and say I hate this new phrase lol it reads terribly how they used it.
Not you not groking Gen Z 😩
The keeds, they are thee fuutureee
Goddamn it I’m “only” 37 and I don’t understand English anymore lmao
Don’t worry. I’m 25 and neither do I.
I’m convinced we’ve hit a point thanks to the internet where language just evolves so fast that by the time I’m elderly kids will literally be speaking a different language.
It was a good run!
At least grok has been around since ‘61.
I’m a young man and I have to agree with your old man take on this. I hate this trend also. A few of my friends have been using it irl conversations.
Tell them that the old men on Lemmy say stop it.
Seconded
Hey, we’re literally shaking our fist at The Cloud.
So it goes with language, always evolving. It can be hard to keep up, but the kids are just having fun.
It’s a typo.
Should be “now”
It’s a variant of the sarcastic “that couldn’t be me”
e.g.: “Goofing off for a week and then cramming the night before the final exam? That couldn’t be me /s.” -> “Not me goofing off for a week and then cramming the night before”
Tell me you’re old and out of touch without telling me you’re old and out of touch.
Im like 20 and didnt get it too
Tbh 20 is pretty old
Oh boy just you wait. It’ll come and go faster than you realize.
I know, I’m turning 53 this year and omg it’s going too fast.
They put their watches in “wrestling mode” then their parents get notified of when they stopped “wrestling”
Not is the correct word.
I always take off my watch when I’m fucking. Feels weird with the algorithm watching.
Not me, I want them to know I am asserting dominance.
Yeah who tf out here fuckin with their watches still on idk some folks have no respect 🤷🏻♂️
Hell, I take mine off to masturbate as well.
How the hell are we suppose to do those 10k steps per day now?
Joking aside; I work in a warehouse. I’m closer to 30K a day.
Yeah I started gaining weight when I got my forklift certs. Same eating habits but 20k steps less per day. Now I work in an office so 10k a day is unattainable unless I actively make time to walk in my day.
I kinda envy you is what I mean.
Why is there a watch that can tell when you’re fucking? Only thing it needs to tell is time.
Eh, people have choices in their watch wear, and you’re welcome to have a fully analog watch. Lots love those. A digital watch can be convenient in multiple ways. Personally I keep my phone silent and so both alarms and notifications usually come over my watch. I also have it watch my sleeping habits, my pulse, and my blood oxygen levels at night.
My watch AFAIK doesn’t have this part, but apple watches can warn you or others if your heart rate is out of range, which can sometimes catch certain issues if the person is susceptible. Of course that gives up some privacy but some people accept that trade off.
I understand fully people not wanting or trusting that stuff, but it doesn’t mean it shouldn’t exist. Just because I don’t like pickles I don’t believe they shouldn’t exist.
Eh, people have choices in their watch wear
But people—all of them— have less choice when we normalize and allow to exist the sort of spy tech that can tell Apple (and apparently your family) when you are fucking.
it doesn’t mean it shouldn’t exist
That’s absolutely what it means.
Uber knows when you’re boinking, so I imagine your cell provider does too.
Conversely whatever your Apple Watch figures out should remain on the device or be encrypted in iCloud, as it should be for 95%+ of iCloud users who’ve enabled 2FA. Health records can be shared with providers, but only if they use OAuth. Providers can be hacked whether they record your vitals just in the doctor’s office or you send them your data.
The workout sharing seen in OP is a collective get-your-friends-off-the-couch effort which can be quite motivating. The couple in the example chose with whom to share. Seems a reasonable cost-benefit to me.
Similarly, being able to rideshare even though it exposes cultural, social, sexual habits… and being able to have two-way communication using a smartphone although it exposes the same to the cell towers… reasonable cost-benefits. (Back to the watch, it could detect a heart problem without ever being hacked!)
I always hope for stronger laws governing use of these intimate insights, though.
Uber knows when you’re boinking, so I imagine your cell provider does too.
Guess what other technology I also don’t think should have panopticonic capabilities.
I’m also not seeing why two way communication requires measuring heart rates.
We can do all the cool shit tech does without the spying, those who " own " that tech just couldn’t monetize it as well.
but… it’s… got electrolytes.
Why do my plants need a fucking Apple Watch?
If you take your watch off then it can only be because you’re fucking. The algorithm knows.
Sure. It can know that I am, but that doesn’t mean I want it watching.
Are they wearing their apple trackers while “working out”?
Why does Richard always finish working out 10 minutes earlier than his girlfriend?
If it’s not their family getting the notifications then who is?
How are they going to someone else, And how do we have a picture of it?
This is so confusing
I think it’s a typo it is meant to start with “Now” instead of “Not”
It’s slang grammar. The family are getting the notifications.
The “not” just shows that it is embarrassing for oop (see also the crying emoji).
Imagine oop covering their face with their hands and saying “oh no! Not this! Not my family getting these notifications!”
Tandum bike.
