jordan @jordan stratton
In order to get a true representation of each country’s athletic skill, the Olympics should randomly select citizens to compete like it’s jury duty:
Who’s next on the balance beam for the US? Is it Simone Biles? Nope it’s 39yo electrician, Dale. Wow he does not look confident
It would actually be quite entertaining if you let people choose their field, that way you’d get people at least somewhat competent.
Or do half and half. Let one half be random and the other half people that “want” to be there, and call it out. “That’s Dave, he’s doing terrible, especially considering he specifically asked us to let him do this one.”
Putting an average person anywhere near gymnastics is just preparing to watch someone break their neck.
Would the people be forced to participate?
So, Salt Lake is in the running for the Winter Olympics in 2034. But they’re all worried about the winter inversion (which we had in 2002 when we last hosted the Olympics, it just happened to clear up the day before the opening ceremonies). Our particulate pollution is so bad right now, the air is unhealthy even for people in good shape. The inversion traps all the smog and pollution in our valley for days at a time.
Much of the events will be at ski resorts above the inversion, but the athletes in the valley will have to bring inhalers and/or particle masks with them. Pollution will be even more greatly amplified by the polluting port that salt lake is opening soon.
Meh, it’s entertainment value would be lost after after the first couple go around. Would have to switch it up to Japenese Ninja Warrior style competitions to keep it interesting.
Would be better to place random people in government as true representation of the people. I truly believe anyone who wants to run for office is not fit for office.
But yet “Survivor” is still on the air…
Are you saying survivor needs more ninja warrior? I’m game.
Might be a bit far-fetched to call it a true representation, but yeah, the Dales and Susans would make it more diverse, but also potentially Hunger Games-like.
We all know this idea would work.
This is basically what the draft accomplishes.
39 Year old Electrician Dale walks across it without any issue. You see, it’s just like one of his jobs that someone else engineered from a desk without ever seeing that the job is impossible. But, Dale is the man who pulls it off by crossing narrow trusses carrying tools and the new equipment, while his assistant watches from below rethinking his career knowing Dale’s the man he’s going to have to replace in the next 10-15 years.
Way to go, Dale!
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That’s the point. They intentionally avoid people with higher education for a reason.
Didn’t Bill Murray have a joke like this
He said they should have a normal guy competing next to the Olympians, so we can see just how skilled they really are.
Aha, that’s it
It definitely inspired whoever said this though.
So this could be great the way you would have to make it work though Is each country would have to have 100 Or more citizens competing in each event. So that 1 or 2 really good or really bad citizens don’t throw the entire competition.
And how much more invested would people be when there are more people who they actually know personally. Hell yeah if my 87 pound next door neighbor gets picked to do shotput am I not going to watch them Throw that sucker 3 feet?
For safety, maybe an age range of something like 18-65. Now, how do we prevent the selection from being rigged?
Now, how do we prevent the selection from being rigged?
Let all the other countries openly select “athletes” from your country’s official census data. It’ll turn into a complete shit show, but it will be entertaining. Dale’s entire company is going to get tapped for the 100m dash, but so will a bunch of farmers from rural China.
But you also have to remove the incentive to rig it in the first place. The current Olympics are used as a tool to promote your country as having literally stronger people than others. So that’s gotta stop. This means no prizes, events that celebrate the worst along with the best, and last place gets as much attention as first.
I am now picturing a baby competing with a 100 year old in the hundred meter dash.
Take all my money I must see this.
You’ve now made me discover some great YouTube videos
You think the Olympics would be safe for an average 65 year old office worker?
This is how the Hunger games actually started before they got bored of the bloodless competitions.
I think there should also be the “Ultra” Olympics where each country puts forward their most highly performance enhanced athletes.
With performance enhancing drugs allowed, right?
Alongside genetic modification. I want full teams of selectively bred and drugged mutants doing battle.
Can we bring AI enhanced cyborgs?
Inter planetary javelin throws? Maybe just add a dart board on Mars while we’re at it.
Anything goes, Russian Olympic Committee style!
And exoskeletons.
I would like to enter in my own competitor: Tom Howitzer.
“Next up on the javelin throw is Ivan Ivanovich. Weighing in at 450 pounds of pure muscle and built like two refrigerators side by side. Let’s see if he can beat his previous personal best of 2,5 miles…”
Javelin is actually a bad example for this, because javelins were redesigned about 40 years ago to not fly as far.
How is that fair for anyone trying to beat a previous world record? Or have they already all been beaten with the new javelins?
No, the longest throw is from 1984:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Men's_javelin_throw_world_record_progression
They essentially just restarted records, mostly in the name of safety, as most stadiums don’t have the room for people throwing 120+ meters.
Not a problem for Ivanovich. He flexes his steroids at atmospheric friction and the Earth’s gravitational pull and lets it fly. All he’s gotta do then is beat out the gravitational pull from his delts.
Ultimate Olympics would be a bring-your-own souped-up javelin kind of event.
Like Taskmaster?
Task 1: build the most aesthetically pleasing javelin.
Task 2: throw your javelin the furthest from beyond the rope.
I would be much more interested in sports in general if they removed all bans on performance enhancing drugs entirely. Football players the size of Buicks who can run through a brick wall without so much as a bruise.
On a slightly related topic, baseball would be a much better sport if you could take the bat with you after you hit the ball.
They already do that, it’s called the “Olympics”
Yea I meant like chemically performance enhanced.
AKA the Russian Olympics
Basically Jeux Sans Frontieres
