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1-6 is good. Everything else is bad.
R1, Mando, TCW, SWR, TOTJ?
All bad
Read it as “All-star wars”
Guess I’m looking kinda dumb
Hey now
I can’t. You have none.
Wrong, you are.
“Episode 1” an acting abomination. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Much of it, yes, but the real reason Qui-Gon died at the end is because he was exhausted from carrying the entire film on his back.
Liam Neeson had the gravitas and experience to do his own thing, and almost everything good about that movie involves him. McDiarmid too. The younger actors, including Ewan, and the bit players were almost universally meh to dreadful, and frankly Portman was probably the worst; her line readings in or out of the makeup were stilted and straight up amateurish. While he was given garbage to work with and wasn’t some sort of prodigy who could elevate it, Jake Lloyd at least brought energy and authenticity. Lucas should have at least gone the ROTJ route and shadow-directed, but with a no-name “official” director who was good with actors. The story for Ep 6 is very iffy, but the performances themselves are fine, even with Ford sort of mailing it in; Marquand was able to turn that apathy into a certain bemused ennui.
I’m not going to blame the performances on the actors here because…look at the material they were given. Obi Wan’s character was “also there tagging along.” It really should have been Qui Gon sitting on the ship, meditating, being wise and occasionally offering advice to Obi Wan, a somewhat headstrong young man who has very nearly completed his apprenticeship and will soon test for the rank of Knight. Instead of…sitting on the ship doing mostly nothing while the old gummer goes on all the adventures. In Ep 1 especially, Padme has basically no personality. In the Queen makeup, she’s monotone and officious, out of makeup she…is like 14.7% stuck up, 9% a girl, 76.3% staring into space. What was Natalie Portman supposed to DO with this role? We’re told she’s “young and naive” but she does basically nothing of her own volition that demonstrates naivete.
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Sure.
Book of Boba though… except for the Tusken parts. Reminds me, did anyone ever make a fan edit of just the Tusken story, bringing Boba back to life?
Book of Boba is fine if you don’t walk in with preconceived ideas of what Boba is supposed to be after nearly dying
And if you are used to watching chase scenes at the speed of a nursing home relay race. But they’re done by cyberpunk teens that for some reason are on one of the lowest tech planets.
I liked the junk punk bikers. Just seemed like an evolution of pod racing.risky and junky
You’re entitled to your opinion! I would have liked them more if they were junkier, but to me they were more of a polished mid-century/greaser asthetic that didn’t fit in on a sand planet. Street gang on Coruscant? That casino planet I forget the name of? Sure, why not! But Tatooine? Nah, too polished. Sand is ruining that paint in one joy ride.
What the fuck is with the bikes?! I couldn’t understand the bikes. They were so insanely out of place…
That’s asking a bit much. We’re talking about a fan base that expects mid 60s Luke to be the same, idyllic farm boy adid 20s Luke.
That he tries to become a new crime boss by being a good friend to the people? Because that just does not make sense, he seems quite anti-crime for someone taking over from the local crime boss.
Explain how a bounty hunter ends up as a crime boss anyways. Like it’s literally his job to hunt them down, he’s just swapped roles now.
I was fine with this… Like, yeah, it makes little sense and it’s lazy, but shit like him riding a rancor all around the city in the middle of a firefight is what really made me facepalm.
The Holiday Special, it’s a train wreck.
You besmirch the good name of train wrecks.
Sounds like someone just hasn’t found their Lifeday Spirit.
insert garbled wookie noises here
It’s just not life day without Grandpa Wookie fapping to a music video in the living room.
I agree! But I still haven’t seen rise of Skywalker. It’s the only star wars movie I never saw in theaters or at all, I liked TFA a lot, hated where they went with the next one, so I completely skipped the last one.
I liked TFA until I realized I only liked it because it was episode 4 all over again. Can’t really mess up what already worked. When evaluated on its own merits it seems to lack any charisma, just another Disney sausage in the content sausage link chain.
I was fine with TFA being just a reboot, but my god there are too many things wrong with TLJ. The last Jedi felt like a star wars film made by people who had no interest in star wars and had no idea how the characters worked.
Should have been Leia or Akbar who died on that ship. separating Rey and Finn was a mistake. Killing luke was monumental fuckup. I can go on and on. To the point that I lost all hope and didn’t even bother to go see Rise of Skywalker.
My main issue with it (outside of plot holes like “how did Finn craft a stretcher and carry a full grown woman 30 miles in five minutes”) Is that RJ fundamentally misunderstands subverting expectations. He thinks making a character do the opposite of what they would actually do (or whatever anyone with a brain would do) is “subverting expectations.”
Subversion is when you take a trope or a plot point and turn it on its head, e.g. Making Rey fall to the dark side and join Kylo after they kill Snoke and his guards. Now THAT would have been a subversion.
Making Finn run away, Admiral Holdo a moron, and Luke toss his lightsaber isnt subversion, it’s just slapping an UNO reverse card down and pretending its smart. Tricking people by throwing out all possible logic and character development isn’t some brilliant screenwriting, it’s the epitome of laziness and bullshit spectacle.
I’d add, it’s okay to like things that aren’t great. The new Jurassic Park series is kinda bad, but I still enjoy them anyways.
I second the holiday special, and nine is absurd. That part with the dagger is one of the worst things I’ve seen in a movie.
“Somehow Palpatine Returned”
“They fly now?”
you have to have a very high IQ to understand the star wars sequels. The subtext is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of the extended universe most of the references will go over a typical viewer’s head. There’s also Luke’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Kilji Illumine literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of this allegory, to realise that they’re not just worldbuilding- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike the sequels truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn’t appreciate, for instance, the humour in Rey’s famous line “Somehow palpatine returned” which itself is a cryptic reference to how palpatine’s force spirit possessed the clones of himself he had prepared in advance. I’m smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as J. J. Abrams’s genius wit unfolds itself on the cinema screens. What fools… how I pity them
Or maybe you just need to love star wars enough to convince yourself they are good.
Its copypasta
This text could originate from videogame donkey.
I agree, everyone who doesn’t like all of star wars is a big dumb idiot. Only smart guys like us can appreciate. I mean “somehow” Palpatine literally did return. Heh. Dummies.
I gonna be honest. . I didn’t love the sequels…
But I didn’t hate them.
Then one day I heard “star wars is having an official Canon event in fortnite” and rolled my eyes figuring some promotional cash grab bs.
Then when I heard “somehow Palpatine returned”, I looked more into it, and turned the movie off. I still haven’t seen all of it.
I love the shows.
The Force awakens was fun but not great star wars.
There is bad star wars, and you summed it up perfectly.
That was the last movie I saw before the pandemic, and I didn’t go to the theater again until October 2022.
I felt like the movie was so bad that it ushered in the end times.
I tryed so hard to enjoy it, you guys!
It’s a horrible mess, but there’s bits in there too like, overall poor though for sure. One of the worst if not the worst. Episodes 8 and 9 tension the only Star Wars content I’ve only watched once. Ben Solo however was a very short bit very enjoyable bit of Star Wars.
I haven’t watched any Star Wars content ever since. I absolutely loved The Last Jedi, so I was hoping this was just another such case of fans being overly cynical, but I just couldn’t like TRoS, try as I might.
I’m not trying to steal anyone’s joy, though. Entertainment value is so subjective.
Lucky you, the last movie I saw in theatre before the pandemic was Cats.
I honestly don’t know which experience was worse…
2019 was a helluva year for movies
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I’d argue that they could have continued making movies, perhaps indefinitely. The problem is that Disney invested a billion dollars and then didn’t spend a dime on writers.
Planning out an overarching story, major plot points, and compelling characters beforehand would have solved just about every problem with the sequel trilogy. Instead Disney seemed to hand the films over to the hotshot director du jour who would more or less shoot from the hip.
Even if we’d ended up with fan service rehashes like the Force Awakens it wouldn’t be the end of the world, just a wasted opportunity. Instead Johnson came in and kicked over the sandcastle which forced Abrams to come back and frantically try to patch it back up.
You’d think that spending a billion dollars would make a company at least try to do some prep work to maximize their investment.
“They fly now?”
