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Canyonaro is far superior
Lol I don’t understand why people want wide cars. There are so many instances where having a narrow car saved me from some dinguses crossing the center line
All things considered, stability and six full seats? Look up Fiat Multipla.
You’re stuck in the “defensive driving” mindset – You gotta go offensive to keep safe. The Chevy Stretch offers significantly greater total mass than even large trucks, and a lower center of gravity. Now you’ll be the one crossing the center line, striking fear into the hearts of the sensible!
Well in lots of the usa we only have wide ass roads.
Yeah that’s not true at all. Someone hasn’t driven on the backroads near me.
Some people have an exaggerated and/or completely broken sense of personal space, and how that keeps them “safe”.
Don’t give them any ideas
Thats how we view American cars, especially pickups that nobody needs and SUVs that have never seen a path that needed 4WD here in Europe.
Pickups, SUVs, and Vans in America are getting unreasonably large because of poorly-written environmental regulation.
In the mid-2000s, automakers were classifying everything as a “truck” to skirt CAFE (fuel economy) standards. The tilling point was the PT Cruiser being regulated as a truck. So, starting in 2012, CAFE standards started to be based on vehicle footprint.
Ever notice how all the little trucks like the S-10, Dakota, and the old-style Ranger all had 2011-ish as their last year model?
Suddenly, small trucks became effectively illegal, and as fuel economy standards get tougher every few years, the automakers have learned it’s easier to just make the footprint bigger than it is to make the fuel economy better. They’ve since re-released the Ranger, but now it’s bigger than the F-150 used to be.
And now it’s hit the vans. CAFE outran the small cargo van footprints, so the Nissan NV200, Ford Transit Connect, and RAM Promaster City have all been discontinued in the last 2-3 years because they can’t make cargo-hauling vehicles that size any longer.
New York City’s Taxi Fleet changed to NV200s a few years back to improve accessibility, and now they can’t buy replacement vehicles without either dropping the accessibility and going small or moving to fuck-you-sized vehicles.
The one neat thing though is the Ford Maverick. It’s a small 4-seat truck with a half-size bed that comes standard as a hybrid (trafitional ICE is an “upgrade” so it meets CAFE) for like 25 grand. The only real problem is buying one since they only made like 4 of them.
It’s crazy to think that Humvees were designed with war in Europe in mind. They are pretty wide and may have been wider if they didn’t have to worry about train tunnels
They were designed so that the wheels would be the same width as the tracks on an Abrams tank.
Remember the times when Humvees were considered big and stupid to drive in civilian applications?
Always have been. H2s were the cybertrucks of their day
In all honesty, the wideness of modern cars may actually be their downfall. I live in a suburban area (Not US, but that doesn’t matter it’s become everyone’s problem.) and the roads were designed for cars to be parked on either side and two, narrow lanes in the middle where people could, slowly, get past each other, with a certain amount of tolerance (i.e. space).
Then came an EPA ruling in the states (late 90’s I think) and trucks were immune to sensible laws and all the car companies made trucks that were immune to being too wide (among other things). They became objects of desire. Cars followed, because everyone wants a thick phallus I guess, or maybe needs to see the road when there’s a fat car next to them, or one with tinted windows, and I’m nowhere near to a legal solution in a global economy.
Practical upshot, local roads are only one lane wide because of fat cars parked on either side with no regard to practicality, add endless renovation because property development is the one true way to richness /s, even though rich people already own the good land, and control their local environment.
TLDR, fat cars break suburban roads.
American culture in general:
“Remember: There is no society - only YOU and the freedom to do whatever you want!”
… the chef’s kiss was in parking your monstrosity next to a Big Sad Box … a beautiful summary of the general North American society we’ve created. Millions of years of evolution to get to the point of selfish ignorantly following a life style to park next to a big sad box and buy an overpriced couch you can’t afford made by Vietnamese children.
And to boast that it’s the absolute Pinnacle of society. It’s the only version they’ve seen but they’re convinced there are zero improvements
I often see a car in a crowded parking lot that is too wide or too long to fit in a parking spot, and I have to wonder if the person driving that vehicle is a complete idiot or a complete asshole.
How stupid are you that you chose a daily driver that doesn’t work? That you take up so much space that everyone else needs to actively avoid you and curse you because you are so bad at making choices?
Do you regret your choice? Do you constantly think “Fuck everyone else around me, I do what I want.”, or do you legitimately not notice how everyone else hates you?
Do you regret your choice? Do you constantly think “Fuck everyone else around me, I do what I want.”, or do you legitimately not notice how everyone else hates you?
It could easily be all of those things. Regret turns to coping poorly through projection1, followed by just ignoring the problem.
Re: idiots and assholes. The Venn diagram for those groups have a rather large intersection.
1. Clinically known as “acting like an asshole”. In this case, it’s the decision that it’s everyone else who is encroaching on their space, while driving a vehicle that is slightly smaller than a shuttle bus.
That requires introspection. Instead they say things like “the idiot that built this parking lot made the spaces too small.”
deleted by creator
I once saw an asshole who managed to park a compact car on 4 Spaces, one being a handicapped spot. I took a picture, but cant find it.
That’s a bad example because it’s a Golf.
Seriously though, pretty much every time I see one, it’s either doing something dangerous and/or obnoxious, or is about to do it in the next 5 minutes. I can also count on one hand the amount of times I’ve seen one respecting the speed limit, and they’re a pretty common car here.
This has been plagerized directly from a Tex Avery cartoon from the 1950s…
Artist nailed it outlining people’s obsession with personal freedoms versus society’s rights as a whole.
They did this already:
I like how the wing mirrors look like actual wings.
Not really seeing the comedy here, to be honest. This is more of a whinge strip.
Yeah, nobody wants wide cars. Manufacturers are making them wider to make it easier for them to meet NHTSA’s CAFE standards.
The standards require year-on-year MPG improvements. The problem is that they require proportionally more improvement on the smallest, highest economy cars, and less improvement on the largest, lowest economy vehicles.
The standards are based on the “footprint” of the vehicle: the rectangle between the contact patches of the tires. The larger the area of that footprint, the larger the vehicle, and the less MPG increase it needs to have.
So, they are pushing the wheels toward the corners, and widening the wheelbase, approaching a square to maximize their footprints. They are making cars bigger and boxier so they don’t have to make them more efficient.
Fuel economy of the cars on the road is actually falling, because manufacturers are effectively prohibited from continuing to make their smallest, most efficient vehicles. They are compelled to either discontinue those vehicles, or embiggen them to fall in a larger class.
Good thing comedy isn’t mandatory. Also fuck car-centric societies that enable the nonsense this strip is parodying.
Yeah, I was expecting it to be a joke like:
- Introducing Longtrucks. 🚌
- Impress even more strangers of the superior person-hauling capabilities with 32 seats.
- Includes a light-up sign 🚍 so you can proudly show to strangers where you’re headed.
- Access a world-wide network of pick-up bays 🚏 for you to pick up strangers from.
Simpsons did it. Canyon Aarow
Fixed url: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PI_Jl5WFQkA
What some folks may not know is that at around the same time, Ford had problems with tires imploding on SUVs. While not called out in the Canyonero spoof, I always thought it captured the public vibe about big trucks at the time in light of this.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Firestone_and_Ford_tire_controversy
Whoops, you can see where I tried to remove the
m.from the youtube URL and messed up!
It’s also literally the motto for the Pontiac Grand Prix.
“Wider is better”
And that was in 1998
Smells like a steak and seats 35!
Unexplained fires are a matter for the courts.
12 yards long, 2 lanes wide, 65 tons of American pride, Canyonero!
