- cross-posted to:
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- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
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Should’ve been the version saying:
Geanie: “It is done”
Person: “But… nothing changed”
G: “Correct”
My 5th rule would be “no ‘fix my IT problem without me telling you what the error message says’”. Because fuck that
Error 0x2e8da08150469
I imagine an alternate 4th panel wherein the genie says “ok you can bring back dead people.” What do yall think? Also I bet we could come up with a themed genie or setting that would punch up the joke too. ♡♡ love it BTW, op.
This is basically what I run for a living and it’s definitely not glamorous.
I feel you. Working in healthcare, ms office is the only thing consistently installed site wide I can take advantage of to run a db.
Couldn’t you use Access instead of Excel or is that not possible for your use case?
Unfortunately IT blocked Access installs because some staff were using it for mission critical processes, and upon leaving IT were required to maintain them. They felt excel was less likely to lead to scenarios like this.
Little did they know excel projects are probably worse to maintain.
I work as a network tech for a globally spanning ISP specializing in fiber services, handling major maintenances that are service effecting for business and government customers (SLAs are in effect). These maintenances are planned and tracked through various excel sheets - housed either in a shared network drive (so yeah, we may run into issues where multiple people are trying to edit the same doc at once), or excel tables in a SharePoint.
Prior to the merger of companies I recently went through, we had actual database systems to track this stuff that worked just fine. And now we’re relying on the same shit a grad student would use to track their doctorate progress. It’ll work until it doesn’t. Looking forward to the shit-show if it gets me overtime.
Employers get what they demand, what they deserve. Anyway excel works as a database until around 1 million entries…
Once you get to a million just start a new one and create a “master” spreadsheet that uses power query to append them all. Problem solved ;)
Don’t tell anyone but I actually do this.
Database? Good.
I use it to connect to another Excel “database” and generate a PDF form to print. No other way around unfortunately.
Don’t be gross, use CSV files
I mean it’s a simple file format so it’ll perform better because it doesn’t have to decode any complex formats or protocols.
Big O? Never heard of it!
CSV is great but the byte loss on numbers is sometimes gruesome.
Japanese companies, this isn’t a wish, it’s a fundamental truth of the universe. Like gravity. No matter the scale or importance of them. I promise you your car exists because of an Excel 2003 file on some underpaid engineer’s laptop that they periodically sync with an inventory system.
This is the way
I once worked for a Japanese company where I had to make a presentation. In Excel, I shit you not. Then we had one of our “shadow” managers make a Japanese translation of the same thing. It took me two days to get the kerning and print layout right, especially with that weird english typeface that is Japanese standard, I hate to think how long the translator took to get their version right.
What’s the typeface? I’m sorry, I know nothing.
I used to make a monthly document that was in English and Japanese. I used either Meiryo or Meiryo UI. That looked ok in both scripts but there is another font where the en looks shit. Or maybe I’m thinking of full width characters.
Last panel is wrong. Genie would just grant him an MBA from a top tier school
It would be funnier if the genie says “there are two rules”
I once looked through a textbook from my friend’s MBA course. The first thing I noticed was in a highlighted box in the chapter on business negotiating: “Your skill at negotiating will affect the outcome of the negotiations.”
These are the people that make 10X what I make.
This is why I refuse to get an MBA. I already know my pants go on my legs. Thanks.
taking notes On the legs, you say? Interesting…🤔
In Czech we say MBA means Mladý, Blbý, Arogantní - Young, Dumb, Arrogant.
I have an MBA and I can assure you, most are not young.
Depends. It’s a business here and there are lots of young people with MBAs and not enough experience to contextualise the things learned within the masters. I mean, some are even doing it post grad.
From my past experience with these types of people, I have a very low opinion on young people with MBAs. Business degree holders who want a shortcut to the top.
My comment was mostly a self deprecating joke, denying the only neutral part of the statement. But you’re right, wide range of ages in any business program.
Whoops. My bad!
Are you sure that wasn’t the introduction to the Speech skill in Skyrim?
I learned this in my first statics class, and I have a BS in business administration.
They gave you some bs alright.
Statics? They teaching yall physics?
Not spelling though… they skipped right past that.
This just struck a nerve…
cries
Isn’t the Genie usually depicted as malicious, or at least mischievous? I would expect the Genie to grant the wish, knowing what a shitshow it would be.
Even Genie have standards.
May I introduce you: webxcel
What the fuck. Thanks for sharing!
“I have to make a brochure for the printing shop and I’d like to compose it in Excel”
“There are actually five rules…”
“In Powerpoint?”
“Make that six.”
Except PowerPoint is actually quite nice to make quick, easy and good looking visualizations and brochures without having to deal with Word
I can personally attest to entire universities advocating for student use of powerpoint for all sorts of printshop work to include thesis and capstone presentation posters for conferences :)
For people who don’t want to spend time learning yet another single-purpose application, it works quite well
Use Libreoffice Draw
Well, Word isn’t really a good choice either.
Paint?
matplotlib
It’s the most approachable for most people. For real graphics design more professional tools are available
like Paint
Anyone else use Microsoft Access…30 years ago?
Fun fact: most of the electronic voting machines in the 2000 presidential election used Access to store vote counts. Access, the “database” with a user-editable audit table.
At least it had an audit table.
ADO or DAO?
How about last week?
Why yes this comic made me think of our users, why do you ask?
My old ass crying in MS Access
one of our partners we have to integrate with at work sends us reports in ms access format. it’s not fun, especially when everything is running in lambda and there doesn’t seem to be any good libraries for reading ms access files that would easily run in lambda.
3gb CSV file goes brrrr…
