‘He’s the cutest murder machine you’ve ever seen isn’t he folx’
He acts like he wants belly rubs but it’s a lie. It’s one of the worst deals we’ve ever made.
‘don’t listen to this imposter, my cat is the best, he let’s you touch his strong ribs, and adorable little tummy. He baps you instead of using his toe knives when he plays, and folx he’s just a little good boi who wants to play. Potentially one the goodest bois ever. He even stays still when I scoop him and he’s a lil sweepy. Have you ever had a dog, he’s just like a dog I tell ya, and he’ll play with whatever interesting garbage you give him. Just the best. The handsomest bird murderer there is.’