IUPAC currently recognises 118 chemical elements. The last twenty have half-lives shorter than Australian prime ministers, and are of equally limited utility to science. However, physicists have predicted that an island of nuclear stability may exist around element 126, containing long-lived isotopes. We propose that this island is actually 400 light-years away.
We instead recommend that the existing IUPAC rules be extended, and that element 10^56 be called ununununununununununununununununununununununununununununununununnunununununununununununununununununununununununununununununununununullium.
