When I’m unhappy, I feel like I’m doing life wrong. I’d rather be happy. But is happiness the point of life, or is there more to it? If I pursue happiness, mine first then for those around me, is that selfish? But if there’s a bigger purpose, then what about people with Alzheimer’s or dementia who can’t recall recent experiences or make plans?
Not all life can have meaning or greater purpose, that happens in fiction mostly anyway.
Find things that make you comfortable, content and feel safe, and fill your life with them. It’s ok to just be.
But isn’t our life really just the story we tell ourselves about ourselves? I guess I’m trying to create a narrative arc, and your comment says to me: enjoy the exposition and character development; it’s enough.
Yeah but just like lives, not all stories are good. When you can’t change fundamental building blocks of your own story to create a pleasing narrative for yourself, all you can really do is exist in what there is. Most people exist like this.
Fighting your objective reality for an unobtainable greater meaning, will cause mental illness if you keep doing it. Come to terms with the real you as opposed to the ideal you, and make what you have for your life as nice for yourself as you can, while you can.
Save your desires for manifest destiny for your OC’s and write some stories about them or illustrate them or something.
I urge you to look into Buddhism. Not as a religion to do ritualistic shit but as a philosophy, as Buddha intended. The only purpose of Buddhism is to address what you’re feeling right now.
Also check this video out. https://youtu.be/pBnH99Mqop4?si=rFGRX_sd9bibUF3f
You might be surprised to hear that I’ve explored Buddhism somewhat, and I think it has helped. I went from worrying that I’m not good enough and I’m not achieving enough, to just accepting who and what I am. I feel that’s been positive. The video you linked sums it up nicely. I enjoy the book Who ordered this truckload of dung? : inspiring stories for welcoming life’s difficulties by Ajahn Brahm (https://archive.org/details/whoorderedthistr0000ajah).
Here is an alternative Piped link(s):
https://piped.video/pBnH99Mqop4?si=rFGRX_sd9bibUF3f
Piped is a privacy-respecting open-source alternative frontend to YouTube.
I’m open-source; check me out at GitHub.
Maybe flip it around? The point of unhappiness (or dissatisfaction) is to get the organism to change up what it’s doing; to locate new goals and pursue them. That can mean engaging with others in different ways than you did before.
If you’re satisfied, you mostly stick with what you’re doing already. (Which might include seeking novelty as well.) If you’re unsatisfied, you may be ready to ditch your current situation for a new one as soon as one comes up.
Dementia in elders is really freakin’ sad. But there’s a lot of difference in people’s experience of it. I happen to know two people in their 70s suffering dementia, who have very different levels of unhappiness. (They also live in rather different situations, although both are in relatively rural settings. Both live with a spouse and with supportive neighbors.)
One is largely satisfied and comfortable; the other is often pissed off and frustrated. This seems to have a lot to do with what their attitudes and social interactions were like before the dementia set in.
Thank you for your comments about dementia. It scares me, but I was wondering if happiness is worthwhile, even if the person that I spark happiness in won’t ever remember it. I think of both elderly people and small children, because my kids no longer remember some of our early vacations, which are some of my happiest memories. And I conclude that making people happy is valuable in itself and never wasted, even if they will forget. Maybe because that’s how I conceive of my own personality or being: I make people feel good and that makes me who I am. But maybe that says more about me or my society than about life in general.
The only purpose to life is to live it. Beyond that, you have to find the meaning that suits you for yourself.
No. Happiness is nice, when you have it, but you have to create meaning in life.
And purpose? You can have a purpose but Life in general does not.
Okay, this is an interesting idea. I said purpose, but you said meaning. Aren’t those the same? Imagine I’m pursuing something pointless, like hedonistic pleasure. Why isn’t that meaningful? How can I determine if my actions are meaningful?
Determine is an ambiguous word, here, so I’m going to break it into two parts:
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You might discover that your actions are meaningful to others. Hedonic pleasure probably won’t be, but everyone is into something.
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You decide if something is meaningful to yourself.
Something doesn’t have to have a purpose to b meaningful; and something doesn’t have to be meaningful to have a purpose, or at least, not meaningful outside of that purpose. I can appreciate the buffing leaves on a tree in spring without needing those specific leaves o that tree for anything. I have several wooden spoons that serve me well in the kitchen but if they disappeared tomorrow I wouldn’t notice or care.
To be clear: Meaning is internal, but purpose is some sort of external function, utility, or goal.
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I’m a big fan of positive nihilism. Everything has occurred by random chance and there are no inherent truths or any purpose to anything. Nothing we do actually matters in the grand scheme of the universe. So, since nothing matters, I am free to exhert my free will and give value to what I choose.
I want to live a life where my perspective is, on the whole, a positive, happy one, and I want to create as many opportunities for others to do the same as possible. I do not want to tolerate those that use their freedom to steal the freedom of others or who seek pleasure at the pain and cost of others. I want to utilize my freedom to seek pleasure and joy and bring pleasure and joy to others without causing pain and suffer.
Nothing matters, so choose the life you want. There is no right or wrong way to live.
Wow you have just summed up my outlook on life perfectly, thank you
This sounds a lot like absurdism, especially the “nothing matters so I can do whatever I want”.
There’s one massive quality that makes positive Nihilism different from Absurdism. Absurdism states that trying to create meaning in a chaotic universe puts you at odds with it. Therefore, doing so creates unhappiness. Optimistic Nihilism, as the common thought I was trying to convey but incorrectly labelled is called, believes that without inherent meaning in our chaotic universe, we are free to create whatever meaning we desire.
Both believe the universe is inherently chaotic and meaingless. Only one believes that you can successfully create meaning.
Hmm, I’ve never heard the part where going against the universe creates unhappiness. Maybe I should read a bit more in depth. Thanks for the explanation.
This seems eminently reasonable. But why do you choose joy over suffering? Clearly you value one over the other and expect others to feel the same. If we all agree, doesn’t that make it right (for us)? And why do we plant trees that we’ll never get to sit under?
I don’t expect others to feel the same. I have chosen to give value to one over the other simply because I would prefer a world where we collaborate towards collective happiness, joy, and pleasure. I suspect many others believe that working towards the prosperity of the collective will hamper their ability to find personal prosperity, and I simply think they are wrong. I think such a case boils down to chasing momentary pleasure over long-lasting pleasure, because that is my experience with such people.
In a way I believe in tangible karma; those who work to bring pleasure to those around them are occasionally taken advantage of, but more often are given pleasure in turn. Likewise, I’ve never met a self-centered asshole who isn’t consistantly overcome with unhappiness, while almost universally blaming that unhappiness on external factors.
I plant trees I will never get to sit under because I appreciate those before me who did the same. Again, that is no more than what I have chosen to give value to.
But this is a bit of a digression. The reality is these are the wisdoms of my experiences, and I wager there’s no universal truths in them. Nothing matters, so I look to these experiences and see that a co-operative, collaborative life looks more pleasurable. So I strive towards one, encourage others to do the same, and refuse to tolerate those that would actively work to steal happiness from others. Yes, I am aware that the inverse is equally true - why is it wrong to steal happiness from others if nothing matters - but this perspective is simply not the one I have chosen to place value on. Arbitrary? Sure. It still represents the best way I’ve found to enjoy life.
I don’t think there’s a purpose, really; to put purpose or duty to a sense of joy is to try to quantify it, to package it - and since everyone is different, and perceives things differently, then that means joy takes just as many different forms and can’t be packaged so neatly.
I think life in every sense is more chaotic than that, and that randomization of cells or events or emotions can’t and shouldn’t be whittled down into some universal experience or explanation. Making something your “purpose” immediately brings with it a certain expectation - it almost makes it sound as if you’re trying to be happy out of duty, which seems…weird.
I don’t think you’re failing at life if you’re unhappy. Everyone has low or weak points, and that inevitably changes in some form of another. That’s one of the universals, a product of events and living situations and hormonal/genetic makeup. Sometimes people can have all their needs cater to and still your brain will fuck you over.
So I’d ask yourself why you’re looking for a purpose in the first place. It makes sense if there’s some goal you want to attain; and if that goal is happiness, it’d be best to think about some actions you could do to obtain it. If you’re not looking for that goal and just asking why people seem to pursue happiness, then the best answer I can give you is: why not? Suffering feels bad and I don’t wanna feel bad.
Happiness is fleeting. You should seek contentment over happiness.
Life IS the purpose. If you’re alive, you’re already fulfilling your purpose whether you are aware of it or not.
Personally the point to life for me is to find something I love and add to that space. I love music, so my purpose in life is to make music, be that playing live or mixing and mastering or composing songs or recording stuff. It’s something I dream about, even though I already do some of these things.
But I’m just one guy. My personal subcribed to philosophy is absurdism. Nothing has meaning unless I give it meaning, so fuck you Im going to eat a pineapple with chopsticks.
The point to life is whatever you want it to be. If you need help finding that I would try tap into what you would love to create or what you would like to achieve.
A very philosophical question, so I’m going to ramble a bit:
I think there cannot be an objective purpose to anything, because any purpose can only go so far. E g. if the purpose of life is to be happy, then what is the purpose of being happy? And what is the purpose of that purpose, and so on? It never ends, there will never be a final answer giving everything before it objective purpose, because that is not how purpose works.
Purpose is a human concept, designed to structure our lives and to help us come up with sub-tasks for bigger goals. And it only really works if we fill in the final goal by saying “because I want that, for whatever reason”. For many someone else fills in that goal and we just follow it, maybe feeling a little empty inside.
So I think the real question is, how do you find that final answer, and the only thing I can think of is: Whatever feels right to you. And right doesn’t have to be happy, right means true to yourself imo. If you had a nice day then it might mean happy, but if you had a shitty day then it might mean seeking comfort or some distraction.
The one thing that can make this very difficult is having expectations about what you should be or feel, and those expectations not matching up with your subjective reality. We all have them, from our upbringing, our peers and experiences, and they can often be very subtle and subconscious. But they are only useful if they help you find your true self imo, otherwise they can be very misleading and painful.
There’s not a single “42” comment here… I am disappointed
life is just life. It’s not the universe and everything
There is no objective, defined purpose to life. People assign meaning and purpose to their life. Some people’s purpose is to live in the way that their religion asks them to, some want a legacy so their purpose is to leave their mark on the world, some people live to help others, some live to be happy, some live to experience the world, some live until they die and that’s it.
I’m no life coach, and I don’t know you. I can’t know if you’re selfish or not, and I don’t think there’s a bigger purpose. If you want the 2 cents of some random guy on the internet, try to live in whatever way brings you the fewest regrets. Everything can be taken to an extreme (even happiness), and there’s a tradeoff to everything.
There is no inherent purpose.
As a hedonist my answer is yes. Life doesn’t have an actual point. It wasn’t “made” on purpose but because it got the chance. What you make of it is your decision but since we have a brain that rewards us and a nociception that punishes us depending on how we use our life I suggest you choose your own purpose. Mine is to be happy. Even when I’m altruistic I’m secretly egoistic because I feel better when my environment feels good too.
The purpose of human life is to submit ourselves to the Idea.
