I’ll give it a shot, “I thought I apologized already, but whatever…”
Bring out a ukulele.
I was just [insert action here].
To whom it may concern
As already addressed in my last e-mail: some of you …
You don’t really deserve this, but whatever dick head…
Oh, it’s a D. I was wondering what click head is.
keming
“I’m sorry you feel that way” is up there.
Classic non-apology.
It’s not that I did anything wrong, it’s just that you decided to feel offended about it, that’s the real problem here.
I saw a standup comic talking about people getting offended once and he talked about this saying. I am HEAVILY paraphrasing but…
“Im sorry you feel that way” isnt a real apology, but its how I feel about people coming to a show, laughing at 9 jokes and then being personally offended by the 10th. I dont want to offend people. That joke has killed the last 20 times I told it so while I’m not changing my jokes I genuinely am sorry they feel that way."
Only right answer.
If you don’t think the same, I’m sorry you feel that way.
And that’s most every corporate apology out there!
“I’m sorry that you were upset about it”
“I feel like I shouldn’t have to keep apologizing but I will anyways”
“I’m sorry if what I did was misinterpreted”
Or my favorite
“It’s not something that I need to apologize for but if it makes you happy”
I’m sorry you feel that way.
I’m sorry, but …
That one entirely depends on what the “but” is. You can be sorry and have an entirely good reason for fucking up. Its not a great start though.
“You slept with me and didnt call me all week!”
“I’m sorry but there was a TNG marathon on”
I’m sorry, but my mom died"
I’m sorry for your loss
but…
The card did say “moops.”
“Ew do I really have to apologise to it? Fine…”
deleted by creator
“I know I’m not wrong but…”
“The intent is to provide players with a sense of pride and accomplishment”
“you guys have cellphones right?”
“Perfect, I’ll just text you my apology”
“This shouldn’t be necessary, but in case you got this wrong, …”
It’s not me, it’s you
Ya know, I’m not actually sorry, but I’m being forced to apologize. Next time just don’t get upset, you cowardly snowflake and I won’t have to apologize. Sorry, not actually sorry.
