This leads me to one of my favourite dad jokes:
What do you call a fly without wings?
A walk
Can’t wait to bust that one out when I see my nephew
Animal that does not live up to its name:
cuttlefish - is not a fish
Animal that does live up to its name:
woodpecker
TIL woodpeckers have a massive wooden cock
I dunno, my local woodpecker attacks my aluminum downspouts every few weeks. Not the most literal of birds.
Image Transcription: Tumblr
erinsintra
animals that do not live up to their names
- horseshoe crab (not a horseshoe; not a crab)
- peacock (has no cock)
- sand dollar (not made of sand, actually costs 13 dollars)
- butterfly (does not contain butter)
- jellyfish (not a fish)
- cuttlefish (see above)
- vampire squid (not a vampire)
- bearded dragon (beardless)
- bald eagle (is not bald)
- sunfish (will not kill you within minutes due to intense heat as you approach it)
- ping pong tree sponge (cannot play ping pong)
- praying mantis (atheist)
animals that live up to their names
- fly
What about a roadrunner? They do occasionally run on roads in real life, so they do live up to their name.
Ohh yeah that’s fair, In my head they’re dishonest about themselves because they’re unlike the cartoon. my child self must’ve been very offended by that if I still feel that that way. can’t say that i really remember though…
Elephant shrew: not an elephant, not a shrew
Golden mole: not a mole
Otter shrew: not an otter, not a shrew
OK, now you’re just being shrewd.
You otter quit while you’re ahead.
Not every praying mantis is atheist some worship the moon
all preying mantis worship the blade.
Bald Eagles have no hair. Ergo, bald? /S
With that logic, the common barn owl should be called the bald barn owl. The grey-crowned crane should be the bald grey-crowned crane. The harpy eagle should be the bald harpy eagle. Also, the great white shark should be the bald great white shark, mosquitos should be bald mosquitos, and amoebas should be called bald amoebas.
I wonder if you don’t know that "/s” denotes the end of a sarcastic comment. Maybe you didn’t see it. Or perhaps you regularly deal with people who hold this belief in earnest.
You thought my comment was serious? Whoa…
I’m pretty sure ca. 50% of peacocks have one.
actually, all or nearly all peacocks have cocks. the ones that don’t are peahens.
I was under the impression that male birds do not possess a protruding organ but indeed have a hole too, hence ‘no cock’.
didn’t think i would be googling “peacock genitalia” today. anyway, you are right. i was confused because I know that ducks have penises, but as I just found out, ducks are actually an exception in the bird world. most birds just kind of rub their holes together. this is sometimes called “cloacal kiss”, which is really funny.
TIL, and thank you for allowing me to avoid googling that
Peacocks actually have no penis whatsoever. Be glad. You give a bird a penis and they get really into rape
That’s interesting. I only knew about ducks and assumed peacocks would be similar.
They do look the raping kind, i’ll give you that
See also: ducks
i wish i didn’t have to see it honestly. i saw duck rape too many times and it’s horrible every time.
Im 99.9% certain that whomever named the ping pong tree sponge was high, drunk or both at the moment of inspiration 😄
The sunfish checks out, though, since it likes sunbathing.
ant eater
They dont eat ants???
No no, I meant as an example of it actually does what it says
#Transcription:
erinsintra #animals that do not live up to their names
- horseshoe crab (not a horseshoe; not a crab)
- peacock (has no cock)
- sand dollar (not made of sand, actually costs 13 dollars)
- butterfly (does not contain butter)
- jellyfish (not a fish)
- cuttlefish (see above)
- vampire squid (nota vampire)
- bearded dragon (beardless)
- bald eagle (is not bald)
- sunfish (will not kill you within minutes due to intense heat if you approach it)
- ping pong tree sponge (cannot play ping pong)
- praying mantis (atheist)
#animals that live up to their names
- fly
The Antarctic Midge sends its regards.
Hippopotamus - neither a horse nor a river.
I can’t believe it’s not butterfly
Moths
king cobra - not a true cobra & snakes are largely self-organizing without monarchs
We’re more of an autonomous collective!
I like the philosophical implications of the word king in the context of king snakes. For snakes, it just means that their diet consists primarily of other snakes. This implies that to be a king is to be a predator who preys on his own subjects.
They’re probably anarchist
Checkmate
Ssssssssnake jazz
