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As a Finn I say this is fine. Every military resource that is tied down and not raping and destroying Ukraine is net positive.
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Finland is NATO. He’ll NEVER invade Finland. Have fun dividing up your oh so great, properly trained and well equipped army haha! Not like he’ll need the troops in Ukraine, that war is going as smooth AF.
We all better pray you’re right. If he does end up trying to invade Finland, it’ll be a global f*ckup
Can you expand?
Russia clashing with multiple nuclear powers. What could go wrong?
They’ve been held at bay for over a year by a smaller army with at best 20+ year old “B stock” conventional munitions often Jerry rigged to give half the capabilities they have when used as intended. Russia is a paper tiger who would get the Iraq revolutionary guards treatment inside 3 weeks if they start shit against the finns. And nobody outside Putin himself is suicidal enough to start throwing nukes.
You’re assuming Russia is going to be a rational actor, and that there are enough checks and balances to keep Putin from using nukes.
What is this, non credible defense? If you believe that, then nothing matters and all options are on the table including preemptive action, because you either assume that MAD is enough to stave off that stupidity or you dont. But…this is all bullshit propaganda and saber rattling so who really cares.
The claim is that it would be a global fuck up, maybe implying that it wouldn’t be limited to Russia/nato. Not that this wouldn’t be messy in and of itself, if Russia were to invade, I suspect they would be left out on their own by everyone else. They’re already struggling with Ukraine. I doubt anyone is going to want to step up and help them against NATO. They would probably lose a lot of the external but indirect support they are getting right now because countries would be hesitant to support a country against the us.
If it’s just “war is bad” then yeah, kind of a duh statement.
Hopefully everybody else would be sensible and nobody would take Russia’s side. Hopefully Russia wouldn’t randomly nuke other countries in their death throes.
But even if both of those things turn out fine the economic fallout (and other kinds of fallout if it goes nuclear) will be a global problem.
The idea is to set the strategic position such that your opponent knows that any war would be a failure, and therefore they never try it at all. Finland joining NATO is pretty much that.
This is a dangerous assumption when it comes to nukes, though. Not because it doesn’t work on its own, but because small mistakes have disastrous consequences for the entire planet. Works better for conventional warfare.
I feel like he’s doing this just to threaten the troops on the front line with somewhere colder
Loads of forest up north. I’d prefer a camp fire over gunfire. Just make sure to bring your own axe.
Finns camp in such conditions voluntarily. Russians probably do too, lol. In fact, many Russians in that particular area of Russia are a lot more like Finns than they are like Russians. In fact, they are being repressed, and their language and culture is being systematically erased. If we are playing by Russian rules, this means Finland just has to step in, to uphold the human rights of the Finnic peoples living in this area.
I get your point. However, within a military it’s not like you’re stationed where you are originally from. So, most military left right now are the minorities from the east, or at least, they are drafted and sent to the front an mass. Except maybe for the officers not going to the front. But then again, they aren’t stationed where they are from, but where the regime requires them to be. I bet the minorities living in Russia close to Finland won’t feel much support for the regime, unless they too are too much brainwashed by the propaganda. But in general, the minorities often prefer to separate from Russia completely.
I’ve been making the same argument about the Han population of the Vladivostok Oblast for a while now. Xi actually has a lot to gain there, and no one outside of Russia would bat an eye.
etuomaala
Wow, I can’t believe you’re making me root for a Chinese invasion of Vladivostok. You know what though? At this point, fuck it. Go right ahead, Xi.
Karelia is the region of Russia close to Finland. And these people are technically Karelians (and I’m ethnically part Karelian as my father is Karelian). Karelian historically forcefully were assimilated either into what is Finland or Russian Federation today. Karelian culture is near extinct.
So the plan working as intended. Spread’em thin, Ivan.
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it’s just a sneaky little recruitment campaign… sign up now boys, we’re forming a nice leisurely unit to sit and watch the Finns do nothing… don’t worry, we won’t accidentally send you to die like worms in a ditch in Ukraine…
great. less at ukraine.
Can’t imagine they have too many spare units to locate there…
Have fun with that. This isn’t WW2. The Finnish military is far from large, but they are a specialized group with with a lot of national pride, and Russia currently has a hesitant conscript force with no emotional tie to the cause.
Finland was first created some time during the Cold War between Russia and the West.
Japan-Soviet relations had always been shaky at best, but also incredibly secretive. Even as early as 1925 Japan and the Soviet Union had secret deals with each other regarding fishing rights between the two countries, with the Soviet Union giving up much of it’s fishing rights to Japan with seemingly no explanation as to why.
These secretive treaties and alliances continued right up until just before the fall of the Soviet Union, Gorbachev made trips to Japan months before the fall of the Soviet Union stating the entire time how the relations between them were improving, even when Soviet relations with the rest of the world were worsening.
In fact the entire past 100 years of Japanese-Russian relations bring up many unanswered questioned.
Why at the height of WW2, were the battles between these two countries minimal despite being on opposing sides?
Why did Japan sign a peace treaty with Russia in 1941, just months before their allies, Germany, went to war with Russia?
Why were relations between Japan and Russia always good throughout the Cold War, despite the major geopolitical differences between the countries, and close geographical positions that you think would cause tensions?
The answer is simple, they shared a common secret. A common asset that worked in both of their favours. And that asset was Finland.
It’s unclear when Finland was first thought up, some say it was during the Cold War, and others say it was as far back as the 1920’s, but the necessity of Finland is quite simple.
Japan can fish in the region of ocean between Sweden and Russia without worry for environmental repercussions, after all, nobody’s going to expect fishing regulations to be broken in a place where everyone thinks there’s a landmass will they? And in return Russia get a percentage of the fish to distribute amongst their populace.
It’s a simple case of fishing the Finnish Sea, transporting it across Russia, (that was the real reason for the construction of the Trans-Siberian railway by the way), and then shipping it from the Eastern Russian coast to Japan under the disguise of ‘Nokia’ products.
This is why Nokia is the largest ‘Finnish’ company, and it is also why Japan is the largest importer of Nokia products, despite the fact that very few people own Nokia phones in the country.
There are clearly some unanswered questions to this conspiracy that I’ll try and address below.
1- What about Finnish people? Are they all in on the conspiracy?
A. No. People from Finland genuinely believe they’re from Finland. In reality they are from small towns on either the Eastern part of Sweden, the Western part of Russia, or the Northern part of Estonia.
2- What about all of Finland’s other exports other than Nokia?
A. Finland’s three biggest, and three most well known areas of industry are Oil, Tech, and Software. The oil is gathered in offshore platforms where the rest of us believe the landmass of Finland is, (again the Japanese get to avoid rigging regulations in this respect), the Tech companies have already been explained above with the Nokia post, and Software companies can easily redirect their IP Address through the Finnish sea. As for other Finnish exports, well, claiming Santa comes from your country isn’t a viable way to get people to believe in it.
3- What about Helsinki? That is an enormous city on the world stage.
A. Helsinki is located in Eastern Sweden. It’s not like the people flying there would notice.
4- What about everywhere else in Finland? There’s a lot to it and it couldn’t all be made up.
A. 99% of Finland is forest. A lot of it doesn’t need to be accounted for when addressing Finnish geography.
5- Why do other countries go along with it?
A. At first it was a sign of goodwill between Western Countries and the Soviet Union. A bargaining chip that could be played. But Finland has since evolved to something much more. An idealistic placeholder for what countries should aspire to. No real country could so consistently place first in Education, Healthcare, Gender Equality, Literacy Rates, National Stability, The least corrupt government in the world, Freedom of the press. It’s a concept for countries and people to aspire to. But that’s where the problems about Finland’s existence is disputed. no country in the world can possibly be that good.
6- Why the name Finland?
A. The country was originally made for fishing. What do fish have? Fins. Thus Finland.
7- What about the Finnish language?
A. Look up the similarities between Japanese and Finnish. It may surprise you how similar they are. Which is weird considering the vast distances between them.
8- I’m Finnish and your attack on my people and culture is insulting.
A. I’m not insulting Finnish people or culture. I don’t even deny that there is Finnish culture. When you have a collective of a few million people identifying as Finnish then of course a culture will be built around it. I’m simply saying that that the landmass of Finland isn’t actually there. It doesn’t mean there can’t be a culture or identity of being Finnish however.
9- This is an enormous conspiracy to keep secret, how could nobody else of realized it?
A. Other people have realized it. But imagine the ridiculousness of the statement ‘I don’t believe Finland exists’. Even if we did have undeniable proof of something put in front of us we would still hold the opinion that most of our friends, family, and acquaintances hold to not disrupt social convention. It’s part of the human condition.
10- What about GPS and Satellite Images?
A. It’s manipulated and forged. In the parts of Estonia, Sweden, and Russia that are allocated as ‘Finnish zones’ the GPS locations are changed to match that of Finland. Satellite images are forged. This is how that part of the world really looks.
This is the dumbest shit I’ve read this week, yet i got a good kick out of it regardless
Lmfaooooo fuckin wild
You are a mother fucking genius. I love this, I laughed out loud
Don’t tell anyone but It’s an old-ish meme/conspiracy theory. I stole it from Reddit with no regrets.
I could be wrong, but I think I also heard that Finland has (one of?) the largest artillery forces and really tough land to traverse on the border of Russia
Russia is not invading Finland, it would be suicide.
As an American I’m waiting for Republicans to start randomly saying anti-Finnish opinions. My bet is in about a week.
“The Finns, they, uh… who are they again? Woke, communists, like always?”
My bet is on them being called “atheistic terrorists” or “satan worshippers”
Cornelius Hawthorne: You’ve got a wide brow. What are you, Scandinavian?
Britta: Yeah, Swedish!
Cornelius Hawthorne: spits Swedish dogs. Your blood is tainted by generations of race-mixing with Laplanders, you’re basically Finns.
It will take a while, you can’t expect christ-- sorry Republicans to know the basic geography of a place that was one of the most discussed areas in terms of Cold War policy for decades.
Fox news sometime in a month will have some blonde or angry Irish background guy looking like a confused dog saying how the PM there went to a party.
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I feel like the modders had a woosh moment here perhaps.
Finland’s blank NATO papers were kept in a safe (30 years figuratively?) and as soon as the war(s) started to cause us harm, they were pulled out of the safe and ratified.
From the news at the time of NATO ratification: “Look in the mirror” - Sauli Niinistö
From the news of the last two weeks: Now the eastern border is pretty much closed for the foreseeable future.
My armchair stance: If the Soviets angered nearly 4 million Finns in the 1940s who had only pitchforks and cows and the result was 126 875 dead and 188 671 wounded Soviets. [*](https://fi.wikipedia.org/wiki/Talvisota) Now there is a nation of +5 600 000 grumpy Finns with access to modern weaponry and a bitter memories of the past…
I don’t know what the russian leaders are hallucinating trying to anger us more? :P
Our sorrow of the year is the death of Martti Ahtisaari, a Peace Nobelist. May his legacy to be respected in honor, his wisdom would be in great need as of today.
Sauli Niinistö, who will soon peacefully leave us as a president and join the same history books. Sad we can’t have a another Kekkonen, depends who you ask. I hope the next president will have a stone cool head in this heated world.:)
There are no Russian leaders left with memory of the 1940s.
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I have fully supported every action of my government when it comes to Russia since 2020, though. But sure, if they started doing something wrong instead, I wouldn’t have much control over that.
Having to constantly communicate in abusive opposite-world ideas must be tiring. The notion that NATO is out to invade Russia or something is one of the most ridiculous things I’ve heard.
I’ve heard arguments from sarcasmitron on YouTube that Putin actually believes his own lies. Putin is terrified that the CIA actually caused color revolutions in the 2000’s and 2010’s, and after the pro-constitution/anti-election-fraud protests in Russia in 2011, he’s been fighting against “the shadowy hand of the gay nazi west” ever since.
I find that less believable than the usual dictator playbook that uses foreign scapegoats to create a diversion from internal issues and justify authoritarianism.
Seems like it would happen naturally after a while. He speaks basically exactly like US Republicans and I think a lot of them actually believe their insane BS.
Not surprising that he literally works Republicans like sock puppets
He tells them what to say where it concerns Russia, but they naturally have the same sort of lying, victim blaming, playing a victim and opposite-world tendencies.
Because they’re all rich, white, Christians. That group hates progress around the world and says the same things globally.
It’s like when my kid wants me to talk like DC Bizarro. It’s mentally exhausting.
It’s interesting how this might become a self-fulfilling prophecy if Russia attacks Finland
That’s basically why Putin has been whining about this. He wants to be able to invade neighboring countries without having to deal with the US, EU and NATO.
For real… like Mr. Putin sir, we don’t want Russia. In fact, I must insist that you keep it
I hope some other Russian usurps his dementia ridden ass, 24 years is enough.
It’s simple. Us vs them. Not complicated like the 3D-chess he used to play in world politics.
More specifically, it’s not for us. It’s for the people in Russia (who have no opposing viewpoints to hear) and the… special kind of individuals down at Lemmygrad (I don’t have any sort of excuse for them)
(I don’t have any sort of excuse for them)
you’ve gotta remember, they’re just simple shitposters, the common clay of the internet…
you know… morons.
I’d love to be charitable to them but by god they make it hard
It’s simple: they’re idiots.
You have to be worth something to be invaded.
Oil and gas though
Well true but we could always just get more from overthrowing some middle eastern government. Hey remember when Syria wasn’t hell on earth? Take that Syria, bet you will let John Kerry have his pipeline next time.
There’s too much mud and rain in Ukraine right now, so they need an excuse to pull back
The problem from here looks like Putin has no idea how the country is going to be held together without him.
And Putin is somewhat right. Russia has no one that can threaten it into action like Putin does. Tyrants whose label goes unsaid leave no line of succession.
And Putin, like Rome making a desert and calling it peace, hopes to make everywhere around him rubble because Russia is crumbling.
Russia has no one that can threaten it into action like Putin does.
Russia has had an endless stream of such rulers for more than a thousand years and they do not represent a continuous dynasty. When Putin is gone, he’ll be replaced by someone equally nasty.
I guess this is classic troop rotation shenanigans?
Instead of rotating towards areas near Moscow, rotating towards St. Petersburg gives soldiers a break/training while pressuring Finland.
What pressuring? They’re scared to shit to point of hallucinating threats because they think because we have a prime-eval grudge against them.
If they magically would co-operate with us, drop their shit we would more than happy resume the trade with them.
What military? Drunk old men?
>Be Putin
>Announce NATO expansion is no threat
>Pull most troops from the Finnish border, because holy fuck, Ukraine has turned the entire army you had at the start into sunflower fertalizer
>Have all the units you pulled from the Finnish border incur astronomical losses, because you want to present any win at the next election
>Declare Finland a threat again
>Move the broken units back up to the border
>ProfitI don’t think they even bother with elections. Russia is dictatorship not a democracy
They go through the motions, but yeah, it’s definitely all theater.
Is Putin really that weak domestically to care about elections?
No.
His greatest political opponent just “went missing” (from the prison he was being held in) and “nobody knows where he is now.” Russians have been watching their population get ground into meat by what he originally called “a military exercise” that’s been going on over six times the time estimate that he set, and he’s actively making it so nobody can leave Russia without smuggling themselves out.
He wouldn’t still hold office if he was playing fairly, so yes, he is that weak domestically. Get fucked, Vladolf Putler.
Don’t forget the oligarchs can no longer live the lives they did. Obviously they are complicit with the war but that doesn’t change the fact that there are those that would turn against him if the right opportunity presented itself
Have the days of it being illegal to call it anything but a special military operation in Russia ended?
Putin calls it war, not sure if others are allowed to do that
