Helium mask.
I went through a serious bout of cancer when I was 30 and saw what it looks like trying to fight the inevitable. I’ve been cancer free for about 9 years now, but the suffering I went through and saw in others left its mark on me.
When I do finally get sick again, I will go out on my terms, not the disease’s.
Don’t use the helium gas for balloons, its mixed with enough oxygen to keep you alive, use nitrogen or argon from welding supply places.
I have a book about this, and I think it’s good to plan ahead.
I’m also too scared to read the book because I struggle with suicidal thoughts, and I fear I might make the decision too soon, when I’m in fairly good health.
Assuming present trajectory, taken care of, but regretting being the last man out the door of the family I grew up with, I’m regretfully sure I haven’t met anyone yet who will be there after those folks I’ll miss have all gone.
family I grew up with
I appreciate the ambiguous yet honest and poignant phrasing here. Its reminiscent of how my mother is specified as biological most of the time despite the fact that I don’t call anyone else Mom. It seems sad but I know plenty of people root for me in their own way and thats enough for me :)
Honestly the way I see it, if you need to distinguish bio-family-members, something has gone horribly wrong, or you’re adopted and doing a heritage understanding project
By nobody stopping me from building my own helicopter.
You joke, but my dad literally built (most) of his own helicopter. My mom wouldn’t let him fly it because of us kids haha. He sold it still incomplete
I hope it’s not for a long time. I grew up seeing my great grandmother age gracefully and finally pass in peace in her favorite chair reading John Grisham novels. I admired that woman so much, despite the fact that she lived alone, her life partner long gone, she enjoyed her humble life in her cozy home.
I hope to do the same, for my heart to just stop beating in my advanced age. I’ve told my family that I don’t think I’ll mind even if I’m the last to go, I want to see how it all ends. I want to see the good and the bad of everything. I want to live as long as I possibly can.
i’d like the James Gandolfini. die on vacation somewhere nice.
how’d he spend his last week? worried about the bills and work? no, on vacation in Rome.
we should all be so lucky.
also, i kind of hope my death causes a lot of paperwork.
- Old
- Suicide
- By traffic accident
Cancer is a fairly safe bet; I’m in the western world.
Huh, guess I have a unique one.
I’m pretty sure I’m going to die by falling down. Either tripping or slipping.
I don’t have a very good sense of where my body is in relation to the things around me. I walked into wall corners a LOT as a kid, for example. I struggle to walk down stairs if I can’t look down and see my feet and the stairs. I CAN do it, but I have to go real slow. Because I just don’t have a good sense of where my foot is in relation to the next step.
Pretty sure someday I’m just gonna either fall down a set of stairs and break my neck, or I’m going to slip on something slippery and, again, break my neck.
Cancer or climate change, or my escaping the effects of one/both.
CW: Grim content
I’ve thought about this, and having worked in hospitals and nursing homes, I’ve seen a lot of people die, so it’s given me some perspective.
My husband is the closest person to me by far. He also has a lot of chronic health problems. I suspect he will pass away before me.
The older I get, the fewer people I have in my life. In my 20s and into my 30s, I had a lot of friends, but little by little they’ve fallen off. I’ve got a couple friends in my MTG playgroup and one friend who I go longboarding with in the summer, but beyond that, I’ve pretty much lost touch with everyone. This only gets worse as time passes.
Best-case scenario is that I die in a nursing home or hospital, completely alone. Maybe my nieces and nephews might visit sometimes, but there’s no way I’d ever see them frequently, nor should they feel compelled. I’ll be old and confused in a strange scary place, with people talking in that condescending baby voice that I saw a lot of CNAs and nurses use. If I’m still able, I can play video games or something up until the end, but I have reason to suspect I have the beginning of Parkinson’s like my dad, so slim chance of that. I’ll just die staring at the ceiling, in a completely emotionless void.
Worst-case scenario (most likely) is that I get put in a nursing home but evicted for being too poor. Then I’d just die faster out on the streets or something, or in a shelter. And come to think of it, this might actually be the preferred scenario.
Either way, I’ll certainly die alone and unloved.
Suicide (although it will get a pretty name like, “self-administered euthanasia”).
Eventually my body or my mind will fail, or I’ll decide that there’s no chance that the world will ever improve meaningfully, and I’l remove myself from it.
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Homeless, dead of exposure, under a freeway overpass.
Liquid nitrogen leak over a weekend.
own hand or vehicle accident
