Both would be skittish if you stand your ground but judging by size, one would probably be easier to convince to leave you alone.
Wolf. Wolves are naturally shy of humans, and while gorillas are also, gorillas are also much bigger and stronger. If one decides it’s mad at you it will pull your limbs off. Or worse. A wolf will try to rip you apart and tear your throat out if it’s mad at you, but since it’s in a different weight class you might actually stand a chance if you curl up in the fetal position or whack it in the face with a rock.
If Trading Places taught us anything, a gorilla may also fall in love with you
The other side of the bracket is all the cuddly ones.
I considered making the other side of the bracket, but figrured the posts would get annoying fast.
Also wolves and bears are cuddly??
Also wolves and bears are cuddly??
Absolutely, in theory.
I’m going Wolf personally. I might have a chance with a wolf, gorillas are stupid strong. No thanks.
Also, you can just climb a tree, it is a forest after all
Yeah. Wolves suck at climbing trees.
Forrest like Gump or Forrest like Nathan Bedford?
Like Whitaker
😉
Even though it’s the most prolific killer of the animal kingdom, the winner of the competition turned out to be the mosquito.
My wife would probably pick the man over the mosquito. She hates those things because they always seem to seek her out.
Gorilla? I feel like being super submissive and not making eye contact would probably keep it from tearing off my arms to use as drumsticks? I’m not a gorilla expert though, so anyone who knows more can feel free to tell me. Although I guess with a wolf, you could just climb a tree and be ok, depending on how long you have to stay. Either, I guess. I’m pretty convinced that I’ll die trying to pet a wild animal when the moron part of my brain tells me it’s friend-shaped, anyway, so whatever.
You’re not completely wrong, but if safety is your concern then you should really be operating under the assumption that the animal will attack you. In that case you’ve chosen a 200 kg gorilla who can climb over a 40 kg wolf who can’t. Bears are actually the heavier of the three depending on race and gender, and some of them can climb while others cannot.
Grizzlies can’t climb but if they want to get to you, they’ll just dig out the tree you’re on.
For real, but Grizzlies are the second worst outcome you could end up with in the bear category.
With the first one being ice bears?
If you encounter a black bear, make yourself big and threatening. If attacked, fight back.
If you encounter a brown bear, stay facing it but avoid eye contact and back away slowly. If attacked, play dead.
If you encounter a polar bear, pray for a quick death.
Wolf. Not only do I think my chances are better, I’d also feel less bad about trying to fuck up a wolf if I had to
Considering there’s basically no chance of fucking up the gorilla, I don’t think you’d have to worry about the ethics of the situation.
I’ll admit “trying” was doing a lot of heavy-lifting in that sentence ;)
what are you doing out here alone, Moon-moon?
GOD DAMNIT MOON MOON
wolf, considering they don’t fucking exist anymore (in the US at least, also im sure they still do, just not in significant number)
Also i don’t like gorillas, they can eat shit.
wolf, considering they don’t fucking exist anymore (in the US at least
As apposed to the famous North American Gorilla?
i know, that was also part of why it was funny.
I thought they tried reintroducing wolves to yellowstone, no?
probably, no clue. Would be a pretty good environment for them though.
They exist
to my understanding they do exist, just in significantly less numbers than they used to, leading to the problem with deer populations that we have now, though i could very well be mistaken about that.
But the question wasn’t if we’d rather be trapped with a bear or man, but rather if who we would like to meet in a forest randomly.
Wolf is the best option.
I choose the wolf. I already have 2 inside me, they’ll just see me as another member of the pack.
That third one is also gay
Three Wolf Interior Moon?
I definitely would like more 3 wolf moon shirts to show on the outside what’s going on inside.
Depends if you’ve been feeding them well.
sounds kinda gay ngl
AROOOOO
Nixon?
This takes me back to “gorilla, man, gun,” which was basically the baptist youth camp version of rock, paper, scissors. (It probably exists outside of that context, that’s just where I always played it shrug)
How does that work? Gorilla kills man? Gun kills Gorilla? but what’s the man/gun outcome? Because gun also kills man
He already mentioned it was a religious thing, so chances are slim that the game is grounded in anything approaching logic.
oh please rock paper scissors is also not very logical. so what if paper wraps a rock what does that accomplish?
If you’re the kid that lived behind me in my childhood, you wrap the rocks in paper, light them on fire, then try to them at the BBQ pit in my backyard. If anything, the rock and paper combine into a more powerful weapon.
Yeah, but there needs to be an answer, whether grounded in logic or not. Is it man uses gun? Is it gun kills man, and they don’t understand the game?
Gorilla kills man, because obvious Man wins against gun because it’s an inanimate object Gun shoots gorilla because it doesn’t understand what it is and accidentally shoots itself.
It’s gorilla beats man, man beats gun, gun beats gorilla, it didn’t even make sense to me when I was 8
AROOO THE WOLF
HELL YEAH BRÖTHER! WOLVES WILL RESPECT YOUR PERSONAL SPACE AS LONG AS YOU RESPECT THEIRS! THEY COULD ALSO RAISE YOUR YOUNG 'UNS TO FORM ONE OF THE MOST HISTORICALLY AND CULTURALLY RELEVANT CITIES/EMPIRES IN HISTORY! AROOOOOOOOOOO(ME)
Wolf attacks on humans are rare but common enough to have their own Wikipedia page, but there’s no record of wild gorillas killing anyone.
Which means they’re either super chill, or really fucking sneaky about it.
IIRC gorillas are indeed pretty chill if you respect their territorial instincts, as opposed to, say, a chimp that might try to kill you more or less on a whim
for some reason i find it funny how the animals more related to humans are the more ruthlessly violent ones. apparently bonobos are much more violent than chimps, and orangutans are less violent than gorillas
it makes me wonder how aggressive early australopithecus was compared. apparently they did a lot of cannibalism so probably at least slightly more than non-australopithecus humans. they probably weren’t even close to as aggressive as chimpanzees considering how significantly weaker they were though
Or they happen in Africa so we don’t usually hear about them.
I like big apes.
Wolves are also a lot more common, though.
Thanks Obama.
