Poor matt
Door mat
Format
Floormat
You’re Matt
Who is Matt and why did they turn him into paste for the attention of surfers?
They didn’t turn him into paste… It’s the paste that Matt…uh…produces.
More fat
Black cat
Matt’s just fine, what do you think they made the paste out of? “Is that hair gel?”
I’m the non vegan ingredient.
I save my ear wax and just reuse that for hair paste. You need one of the gyroscope cleaners though to get enough wax.
gyroscope cleaners
You have my attention…
Sit on it and spin buddy
Welp, looks like I won’t be licking your hair anytime soon you monster.
Clearly they’ve added unnatural meat to the formula! Ew!
It’s no longer labeled vegan. A lot of producers actively avoid the label, despite the fact that the Vegan Society would provide their stamp of approval. I’ve heard somewhere putting it on your product lowers sales. All this to say, are you certain it’s actually not vegan anymore?
That’s interesting! I also wonder if its a legal shielding technique to abandon the “vegan” label in case one of their upstream suppliers changes without notifying the manufacturer. If you never claim it to be vegan, you’ve in no danger of violation.
Vegan is not a regulated term. Plenty of products that say they are vegan still have animal products, such as honey.
There are people that hold specific definitions of the term “vegan”. If you never use the word, you can never run afoul of anyone’s definition.
Definitely a thing. Vegan can be hidden somewhere on some products, or they might use different language.
I ran an experiment a few years ago at a party I hosted. I had two trays of Oreos. One labeled ‘Oreos’, the other labeled ‘Vegan Oreos’. Now, Oreos are vegan, but aren’t labeled as such. I had to refill the standard Oreos a couple times throughout the night. The ‘Vegan’ labeled tray ended the night with more than half still there. Vegan definitely plays a role in sales, and not always for the best.
Love it. Science!
Not a randomized double-blind test, but science enough.
Huh. I always thought the white stuff was derived from milk
That’s why it’s spelled creme and not cream. The FDA has standards for milk content in anything labeled cream, but creme doesn’t mean anything.
Someone said the non vegan version has bee wax in it.
The reason the vegan label lowers sales is that smart people already read the product label, so they know it’s vegan either way. Lazy people who don’t like thinking need to be told that something is vegan. Vegans tend to be smart, and vegan-haters tend to hate thinking.
I was about two make a whole lecture about percentage points but it just so happens it actually is ~6% less in this case.
It’s like when you want to make an unexpected factorial joke but they said 2! or 1!
“Matt” paste? Isn’t it “matte” or am I taking crazy pills again?
Edit: What the fuck… It’s spelled differently in the UK, the US, and Canada (where I’m from). It’s matte in Canada, mat in US, and matt in the UK.
From the Government of Canada website: https://www.noslangues-ourlanguages.gc.ca/en/writing-tips-plus/matte-mat-matt
Now I’m not saying anything, but I dated a Matt, and he did produce a lot of paste… I’d have to run the numbers to see if it’s viable for mass-production though.
Hmm, did you try it in your hair though?
… no comment
It’s matte in the US. I think the manufacturer is just being silly
Thirding the notion that it’s definitely not “mat” in the US. A mat is something you put on the ground, Matt is my cousin’s ex-fiance, and matte is a surface finish with little to no shine.
Really don’t know what people say English is hard to learn, we use the same word for so many things that there’s fewer words to learn /s
Why waste time say lots words when few words do trick?
It’s definitely matte in the USA.
From the UK. I’ve never seen matte spelled as matt. CA, UK and AU are generally pretty close with spelling, whereas the US is usually off doing its own thing. It’s a similar thing to blonde and blond.
Blonde = female; blond = male
Excuse me wtf
I shit you not, that is the etymological distinction between the two.
How strictly that distinction is observed is an open question.
But that’s the french’s fault.
I thought it was blond = hair colour and blonde = person with blond hair.
What if they’re non-binary?
Blond because French defaults to the masculine form if the gender of the noun is indeterminate.
If they’re non-binary, you’re going to be so anxious about using the right pronouns that you won’t even notice their hair color.
Edit: it’s a joke answer, people, in response to a joke question. It’s not made at the expense of any marginalized individual or group. The only people who would be anxious about the situation are allies; the 'phobes don’t give a shit. Untwist yer knickers.
Being considerate just takes practice.
Have you talked to your therapist about that?
Nah, most enbys are chill and recognize that pronouns can be easy to forget. You’re just upset that people get annoyed when you repeatedly misgender them.
I had firsthand experience when an enby stayed at our place for a while. My old Gen X self had trouble remembering to use the correct pronouns sometimes, but it got easier with practice. Decades of using only binary pronouns for individuals takes time to unlearn.
I’ll be honest, it took me a while to start remembering “they/them”, even for myself. However, now I have the opposite problem, which is that I tend to substitute “they/them” for gendered pronouns. Normally that’s not a problem because most people accept neutral pronouns, but some people can be very picky about their pronouns and then I have to remember that “they/them” can’t be universally applied to everyone.
Agreed, all the NBs I know are chill.
Their “allies”, not so much.
Blondə
Blondx
Pretty sure it’s matte in the US, too
Seconded. Literally have never seen it spelled mat.
Colour me surprised, at least you greybeards have honour enough to spell some words correct.
‘u’ died with the Queen. Have yo no respect?
Shooldn’t it be Qeen, or did “U” get berried with her?
I appreciate your cheekiness, sir
“Mat” is a small rug usually for wiping shoes on. “Matt” is a boy’s name, short for Matthew. “Matte” means the opposite of glossy.
In Swedish, mat is food
Mat is a man with no arms and no legs on the floor
USA here- matte
Yep all 3 are valid, matte is the new variant. https://www.etymonline.com/word/matte#etymonline_v_9722
And I’ve seen all 3 in use in the USA. It’s not matte = Canada. I’ve seen matte more than mat which is historically the spelling. The oed doesn’t list matt as the proper spelling but who knows with the brits.
Chamber’s dictionary has it as “Mat, or Matt, or matte” stating that it comes from the French “mat” or the German “matt”, so fuck knows where matte comes from!
Probably my Stavanger-dialect in Norway. It’s matt in Norwegian, but matte in my dialect.
The American spelling “matte” probably comes from the spelling “mate” derived from French “mate”, and doubling the “t” to differentiate it from “mate”. The British spelling “matt” was probably primarily influenced by the German word “Matt” considering the UK tended to have more German influence.
Alternatively, either (or both) may be an etymological spelling from Latin “mattus” (which means “drunk” but likely became a word for “pale” in French).
While I am a linguist, I only deduced this from a bit of Googling and a lot of speculating, so don’t take my word for it…
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I’m like 90% sure it’s matte in the UK.
I might be the non vegan ingredient.
I wouldn’t even be surprised if this is just a shift in marketing. The “Vegan” label, in particular, has fallen out of style as more and more men become obsessed with meat-based diets.
It’s some kind of hair gel, you don’t eat it.
It says paste right there though.
???
Keto, paleo, whatever the roid king is doing. The share of people picking that up and going “ew, vegan, it’ll probably turn me into a soy boy” is probably bigger than the share of people who only buy vegan products, OR the savings of cutting those 6% of natural ingredients are worth losing the latter share of buyers. Bottom line is the company’s bottom line.
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Damn, I guess you will have to find a new hair product to eat.
It looks like the 91% natural ingredients version has benzyl alcohol as a preservative which is typically synthetically derived and in my experience can drastically shift the bio-based ratio.
As far as I can see, the rest of the ingredients are the same, but the sourcing of those ingredients could be different which could also shift the naturally derived percentage.
Isn’t that stuff bad for your hair?
I haven’t heard that before but I don’t work on hair care products very often. Benzyl alcohol is used as a preservative in lots of cosmetic products though. It can be considered an allergen for some people, but overall it’s pretty safe (as far as we know so far).
Show me a gel/spray that isn’t. They are all going to be some form of ‘sticky,’ which means some form bonding, likely protein or carbohydrate based. Either of those will take oil from your hair when removed/washed off, and are obviously interacting with the keratin itself to create all the stickiness between hair strands.
“Now made with actual
bitchbeach boys!!”Have we just forgotten about the word “fewer” entirely at this point?
I’m not sure that applies here. Generally, when measuring something, you use less. Like I wouldn’t say , I just drank from my glass and it now has fewer waters in it. In this case, “natural ingredients” is a set of things that are being measured as a single “ingredient”. Like let’s say the natural ingredients are soot and berry juice. Would you say the paint has fewer or less soot and berry juice?
But then again language is all made up, the rules don’t matter, and you’re only truly wrong if the meaning is lost.
I can see that, but the plural “ingredients” still makes my gut say it should be fewer.
It depends on context. If you are dealing with a percentage of overall types of ingredients by volume without changing the variety of ingredients you would probably use “less”. Like if you reduced the mix of milk related ingredients. You would use “fewer” to indicate that the number of individual ingredients had changed. Like if they got rid of two of the ingredients of an original ten.
This could be a category error?
I guess it depends on if it is a case of there having had been 97 of 100 ingredients having been naturally derived and now only 91 of those ingredients are such. Which admittedly seems unlikely.
I mean it could be using the percentages of another number. Like if there’s 20 ingredients and you drop one it’s a 5% reduction or if you added other non natural ingredients that would cause the percentage to drop… But whether it’s less or fewer would depend on information we don’t readily have because we don’t know if it’s ingredients by volume or of it’s a reformulation of ingredients… and may be at the crux of this grammatical problem depending on what you assume is going on?
Mine fewer?
It’s not 6 fewer ingredients, it’s 6% less of the total being naturally derived.
It’s hilarious that you made an even dumber error in a try at correcting.
No more shiny cap either.
Matt paste, matte cap
