By that I mean basically unexpected oases in your life where and by whom you feel nurtured and restored and just safe in the moment?
For me, it was a woman at work who became like a mother to me and I’ll think a bit more about physical spaces but that is a very important aspect also
Try not to say your home space cuz that should be a given. Think outside the crib
I have two spots on the other side of the country, that I haven’t seen in almost twenty years, that still serve this function if trying to calm myself down. One is a waterfall in what was then a very lush patch of forest. Another is a quiet bay surrounded by pine trees.
If I’m having a rough time, more likely than not I’m slowing down my breathing and visualizing one of these places.
A deserted beach we found one time. Very peaceful and beautiful.
Sitting by a bonfire all bundled up. Maybe even drinking cocoa or tea.
When someone I love hugs me tight.
The shower. Sometimes I just sit down in the tub and let life roll away in heated bliss
Oh man. That with a nice, cold drink. Often a beer or cocktail. The dichotomy is glorious.
Sweet, sweet, naked, hot bliss.
This guy showers!
Have you tried a “shower orange”? Can’t recommend it enough.
shower orange
Great offer particularly for a trying time
Nordic spas. Going from dry saunas to cold pools to warming up again in hot tubs or wet saunas and doing it over and over again… Ahhhhhhh
Great question and the fairy fountain angle is a neat way of asking it.
I don’t know, I don’t think I have one of these in a consistent manner. Home space isn’t necessarily that effective for everyone, so it’s not a given.
Not one in the whole journey?
No, all I can say is when I was a child my mother and occasionally grandmother had that effect. It started to get less effective during my teens and it’s certainly no longer a thing anymore. As for other sources that truly nurture AND make me feel safe, no, I can’t think of a single one. I’ve had plenty of people taking nurturing and protective roles in my life but I wouldn’t say their effect was of full restoration and complete safety. Same goes for places. Something is always amiss or not enough for full recharge and safety.
Falling backwards into a soft snowbank in full winter gear and basically falling asleep while snowflakes drift down, melting on my face but otherwise slowly covering the rest of me. Absolute perfection.
Thanks op, it’s nice to think about this stuff
Climbing gym, I roll up high as fuck and put my headphones in and go hard for like an hour or two. When I’m done it’s the absolute best feeling especially when I finish a project route or just do something cool.
Unfortunately all the gyms in my area are closed because of hurricane Helene so I haven’t been able to go for a while.
I don’t know Eric Andre lived on the eastern seaboard
When my cat headbutts me. I love that little guy
I came across a cat while riding my bike. I pstpstpsted at it for like five minutes, and it kept pretending not to be interested. Then, out of nowhere, it just walked up to me - didn’t even stop to sniff, just went straight in for a headbutt and demanded petting.
I gave him a full deep-tissue massage, and he loved it, as if no one had ever petted him before. I don’t think I’ve ever met a cat that friendly.
Respect the deep-tissue massage
The woods/forest. I love to go forest bathing when the weather and my schedule allows, and camping (even at populated camp sites) is so enjoyable.
I live on an island in the Atlantic. There’s this beach cottage nestled in the dunes along the southern shore, and it’s been there for over a hundred years. The wealthy family that owns it no longer lives on the island, but they love the space and don’t want it to fall into ruin so they’ve had a series of caretakers for the past thirty years or so. The position is unpaid, BUT it comes with the freedom to use the property year-round. I was the caretaker for fifteen years, and a few years back passed the title down to a friend (so I can still visit.) It’s one of the most magical places on Earth, and every time I’m there it’s like my health and mana bars get refilled.
Beaches. Specifically where the ocean is hardcore and there’s huge rocks that the waves crash against. There’s this deep sort of infrasound that comes out of the big waves when they meet the big rocks and it’s just like heaven.
My dream is to travel to Nazaré, Portugal and watch the waves there. Bliss. Almighty powerful bliss.
infrasound
Thanks for that word
My home garden. I’m by no means a great gardener but I’m a software developer working from home and just popping in there to spend 30 minutes caring for the plants is really refreshing.
My bed. Im not depressed when I’m asleep.
I have sad dreams too sometimes, nowhere is safe ;(
Last night I dreamed that I was in a Mortal Kombat fight, and my character was Lucifer (Peter Stormare from Constantine) with a goofy laughing expression on his face and he could shoot purple lasers out his eyes. (Edit hold on i have to generate this i don’t know you didn’t ask but HERE)
I’m sorry about your sad dreams though
Cant remember the last time I remember a dream, even when I was young, Id get maybe one dream every few months.
I remembered one a few days ago but there was a 3ish month gap to my last dream.
Do you ever experiment with low music that you enjoy or a comfortable soundtrack or audiobook slowed down and lightly playing the whole time?
I find it can really help set a positive influence on my sleep and the content that comes out while sleeping and dreaming
Walking the streets and sleeping rough a couple of days after arriving in Amsterdam, tired and hungry, a Portuguese guy with almost nothing himself invited me to his squatted place and cooked patato and onion soup and offered me a glass of port and a place to rest. I still hold this memory close.
Lovely!
My closest fairy fountain is hundreds of miles away. I kind of lost that when I moved away from my previous friends. I used to have people where I am like that, but you could say the fairy is gone from those fountains.
Mine did too but the benefit and positive influence did stay with me and we can chat legit anytime I want and we’re right back into it
