Rules: explain why
Ready player one.
That has to be one of the cringiest movies I’ve seen, is tries so hard, too hard with it’s “WE LOVE YOU NERD, YOU’RE SO COOL FOR PLAYING GAMES AND GETTING THIS 80S REFERENCE” message and the whole “corporation bad, the people good” narrative seems written for toddlers… The fan service feels cheap and adds nothing to the story.
Finally, they trying to make the people believe that very attractive girl with a barely visible red tint spot on her face is “ugly”… Like wtf?
Yet it received decent reviews plus being one of the most successful movies of that year.
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Pixar style movies. They all rely on the same facial gags and dumbass humor.
Twister.
The movie is like a big turkey dinner meal and Ambien to me. I have fell asleep trying to watch it at least 3x… now I own the movie and if I am super restless I will put it on to sleep.
Marvel movies. Yes all of them. They’re trash. It’s just cgi slop, badly written one-dimensional characters, cliché tropes, formulaic stories, plotholes bigger than meteorcraters and brainless action sequences. A cashgrab.
A saw a couple; I gave them a fair chance. They’re all the same. The appeal is beyond me. Brainrot at its finest.
The Matrix
No, I will not elaborate.
If you think the movie eas cringe, definitely don’t read the book. It’s so much worse.
Oh I have another one. Thor Ragnarok. People loved it because they liked the Thor character and found his earlier films too dull or something, but I loved that they were unapologetically serious about themselves, using comedy in ways that felt very authentic to the characters.
But Ragnarok? It came out later the same year as this excellent essay about bathos, and it was dripping in it. I was hyper tuned to the problem with bathos, and it leaned even harder into that took than nearly any other MCU film did.
What sucks so much is that it had the bones of a really good dramatic story. The Bruce Banner/Hulk storyline had built up over multiple previous films, and come the climax of this film it’s established that he’s in Bruce form now and has enough control to stay that way, but if he transforms into Hulk it’ll be a big deal and he may never be able to be himself again. So they arrive in Asgard at the climax of the film and it’s pretty urgent. In a dramatic moment you can see him steel himself to make the sacrifice; he jumps out of their aircraft onto the rainbow bridge, clearly intending to transform into Hulk to fight Fenris.
…and he splats. Faceplants on the bridge. Still in human form. It’s played for laughs. The ultimate conclusion of Hulk’s story in this movie and probably the most important moment of his arc over the entire MCU to this point, and it’s undercut by a joke. Not even a very funny one. A slapstick joke that would make Charlie Chaplin cringe.
And it means nothing, because the very next shit, he’s transformed anyway and throwing Fenris around like a doll.
Not to mention it undermines the verisimilitude of the movie. I can suspend my disbelief in these movies pretty hard, but Bruce Banner, in human form, is meant to be painfully average, physically speaking. He should have died from that fall, given he didn’t transform. That’s certainly not the worst thing about the moment, but it is was the sprinkling of salt on top of the wound that just made it that little bit worse.
That moment was the worst bit, but the film as a whole was full of lazy humour and bathos, and it was really just the worst example of what was wrong with a lot of MCU movies at the time. I was shocked to hear so few people came away disliking it in the same way I did.
Se7en
Hated everything about it. Predictable all the way through the big reveal at the end. I don’t understand the appeal.
Donnie Darko.
It was so overhyped back when it came out because the OG hipster crowd of the early 90s thought it was cool, as did younger people who valued things that were “indie” as if that inherently adds value.
A Christmas Story
I have never been able to watch the whole thing. Ralphie’s whining and dull life was just unpleasant. I didn’t really like any of the characters. Nothing in it was entertaining except for the kid and the pole. It was just a slog. I think the furthest I ever got was at a scene about a parade?
It seems like this is a really popular movie but I just never saw the appeal.
Ready Player One was so bad, but this is a rare instance where the book is worse than the film. At least the film has visuals the book is just cringe and rememberberries.
The movie did ruin the Iron Giant, though.
I haven’t seen Ready Player 1, and now I have a reason not to see it.
You don’t disrespect Su-Per-Man.
I am not a gun.
Except when it makes for a cool action movie scene.
Oh hell naw. If you mean that they made him go superweapon, that’s damn near legal cause to burn down a studio
I haven’t actually seen the movie, only a few clips of it. I’m pretty sure they make him use his weapons, but maybe not his superweapon.
The thing that baffled me about that movie was how many “startups” used it as reference for what they were trying to create. Like, did I watch the same movie? Real life was so shitty they had entire blocks of people living in trailers mounted to each other vertically. They used the matrix or whatever it was called to escape. And you want to create that for real?
Why don’t we turn the world into a real life Mad Max while we’re at it.
Why don’t we turn the world into a real life Mad Max while we’re at it.
Have you been around the car culture?
RPO is bad, yes. But Spielberg is a good director and that’s why the movie is at least entertaining. I hate-read the book, but I still enjoy the movie.
The book is straight garbage. Probably the biggest Gary Stu ever. The movie is actually decent by comparison, because it removed a lot of cringe and toned down the main character.
Gary Stu? Is this the male version of a Mary Sue?
Yes.
Yeah, if OP thought the movie was heavy on the “good job being a teenager in the 80s!” content, they should steer well clear of the book.
Very weird take. Everyone I’ve ever talked to loves that book. I honestly cannot picture any conceivable reality where the movie was better than the book.
Agreed. That book was recommended to me by a few fellow sci-fi book fans, so I gave it a shot. Couldn’t get through it. It read like a 6th-grade kid’s fanfic about the 1980’s. Bad writing, bad dialogue, ham-fisted plot.
To be honest, isn’t it a ‘Young Adult’ book, i.e., intended for preteens/teens, not adults?
True, but it’s still poorly written. And so much of the content is GenX nostalgia, it’s obviously meant to be a crossover to those preteens’/teens’ parents.
Young adult means the content is suited for a younger audience, it’s not an excuse for unintelligent writing void of anything of value.
Lets be real here, young adults (I.E toddlers and teenagers) aren’t exactly the most critical readers or familiar with judging literary quality. The writers of books targeted at young adults know this, and tend to not do more work than they have to on plot and world building. Go ahead and write me a five paragraph essay on the value that Warriors added to the medium. No child read warriors for the themes, they read it for the premise of anthropromorphic cat drama and as fuel for their first role-play world building sessions. YA novels are the literary version of comfort food, enjoyable for those that like the taste but you would be foolish for expect a fufilling rich plot with well thought out characters.
By Warriors I assume you are talking about Warrior Cats? I have not read it but I was under the assumption that was a childrens book seeing as how it features cats. When someone says young adult my mind goes to books like Catcher in the Rye or Lord of Flies.
True! But I guess young adult readers don’t tend to be as discerning, which is why I never expect the writing to be any good.
Agreed. The movie is just a fun action film wirh no brainpower needed. If you go into it with no expectations it’s fine.
The book? The author insists on yanking you out of the story with listicles of callbacks and references to obscure ‘80s shows or whatever. The main character is just an ass, and is also conveniently capable of meeting every challenge thrown at him despite being an impoverished basement dweller. The book became a slog of contrivances to get from A to B with “Aren’t all these retro references cool?” jammed in at every opportunity.
Wasn’t it supposed to be bad though? Maybe I misunderstood, but I thought people liked it because it was ridiculous and campy.
Yeah, the book was meant to feel a bit cringey, because the story is told from the perspective of a teenage gamer obsessed with pop culture. It’s the entire reason he wins the egg hunt, because he’s always got these obscure references floating around his head.
The Batman. Robert Pattinson is not that great of an actor and I still can’t unsee him as that stupid vampire. I know he doesn’t care of the role either, but it really ruins the flow trying to imagine him as Bruce Wayne but all I can see is that cringey vampire. And then it’s just another fucking Batman movie as if we haven’t already had 10 other ones played by 12 different actors already, not including the TV show adaptations and cartoons too. DC needs to seriously stick with one adaptation and go with that or make some about some of the lesser known comic characters.
I know it’s the one that is more closely aligned to the comics and he is actually being a detective. But it was so boring and uninteresting.
I remember sitting in the theater and I kept checking my watch for when it would be over. I was with other people and also was curious how it would end. But it kept dragging on much longer than it should have.
I’ve tried rewatching it since but I still can’t get into it.
I thought the Batman was meh, but I reckoned that was partly because I’m not into comics and their storytelling. I couldn’t get into those Sin City movies mainly for that. And I enjoyed Chinatown, it’s not a noir knock. Or maybe it is, I dunno.
I enjoyed Pattinson in Good Time and The Lighthouse. I think he did with the role what could be done. I also think it’s difficult to come out from under a series like Twilight.
The Batman Animated Series had both a Batman that’s primarily a detective that’s not that good a fighter and it was still engaging and entertaining without being so slow.
Then again that show was driven by a dream team from the voice actors to the music and art direction. Sad to say WB cut down on budget animation half way in and it really shows.
I always felt like The Batman was just a boring remake of The Crow.
That movie is so slow and boring. Not terrible but can’t touch the greatness of Nolan’s trilogy. It has better colours, that’s about it.
Ted.
Juvenile fratboy humour done badly, very badly with lots of fan services to get the brainless cheering.
Made me laugh once in the first few minutes (I can’t even remember the joke) and walked out of the cinema after about an hour.
Rogue One: A Star Wars Story.
Absolute incompetence start to finish. Low IQ fans go “Woooo! Vader’s a BADASS!” ignoring how it completely fucks up the opening of Star Wars.
I really liked Rogue One, except for the Vader bit. Really unnecessary fan service, which didn’t fit with the rest of the film IMO.
I upvoted you because it’s my favourite star wars film and I’ve never heard anyone dislike it
It get’s a lot of hate, especially from armchair critics. I’m an armchair critic myself, but I truthfully do not understand the hate. Everytime I rewatch Rogue One, I try to find reasons to hate it, but it’s pretty watchable if you ask me. People hate Jin and complain that her character and motivations make no sense, but I disagree. Her decisions are logically consistent with what she learns about her father as the movie progresses.
Anyway, I enjoy it every time I watch it, which is far more than I can say for the vast majority of Star Wars movies and shows produced in the 21st century.
The first time, I walked out. I was dubious when they introduced Cassian by having him straight up murder an innocent person, but when it came time to assassinate a legitimate military target and suddenly he gets all sweaty and, OH! JUST - CAN - NOT - PULL - THE - TRIGGER!
Yeah, I was done. It took me 3 tries to actually finish watching it, it was so bad.
I found out later exactly WHY it was so shitty…
The original writer/director never started with a script. He started with a supercut of scenes from other movies to try and figure out how long each scene should be. So the bit with Jyn arguing with the rebellion? That was the scene from Aliens with Ripley arguing with the corpos, and so on.
"There was no screenplay, there was just a story breakdown at that point, scene by scene. He got me to rip hundreds of movies and basically make ‘Rogue One’ using other films so that they could work out how much dialogue they actually needed in the film.
It’s very simple to have a line [in the script] that reads “Krennic’s shuttle descends to the planet”, now that takes maybe 2-3 seconds in other films, but if you look at any other ‘Star Wars’ film you realise that takes 45 seconds or a minute of screen time. So by making the whole film that way – I used a lot of the ‘Star Wars’ films – but also hundreds of other films too, it gave us a good idea of the timing."
So not starting with the script is problem #1. Problem #2 was just shooting random shit with no purpose. This is why the trailers were full of shots not used in the movie. He called it “Indie Hour” and straight up admits he had no idea why he was doing it:
https://gizmodo.com/why-the-rogue-one-trailers-most-iconic-shot-never-appea-1790910745
“I was like, “Oh my god that looked great.” And I was like “Stop stop stop!” and everyone stopped. “This will take 10 seconds, just roll camera”….Then obviously 10 seconds turned into a half hour, and we probably did 17 takes. So that ended and there’s that feeling of, “Well what was that for?” And I was like, “I don’t know, that just felt good.””
So, naturally the original writer/director got bounced out and they had to bring in a new guy to salvage the mess as much as he could, which meant re-writes, re-shoots, etc. Problem #3. His biggest problem was he never liked Star Wars and didn’t feel strongly about it. So, main character murdering an innocent? Meh, no big deal.
https://www.worldofreel.com/blog//2018/04/tony-gilroy-says-rogue-one-shoot-was.html
“That was my superpower. A) I don’t like ‘Star Wars’—not that I don’t like it, but I’ve never been interested in ‘Star Wars’ ever, so I had no reverence for it whatsoever, I was unafraid about that and they were in such a swamp… they were in so much, terrible, terrible trouble that all you could do was improve their position.”
It’s funny, the one thing you specifically called out is the one part of it I did like. The connection to the beginning of A New Hope is great. But I didn’t like pretty much any of the rest of the movie, including the rest of the final sequence. Especially that nonsense with the non-jedi Jedi.
The only thing it messed with was one line about Bothan spies?
Bothan spies was Jedi, not Star Wars. :)
That line was about the second death star from RTJ.
I understand most of this view. Most the movie is pretty bad. I do think it makes a fitting transfer to ANH though.
How does it completely fuck up the opening of star wars?
It makes Leia’s bald faced lie that she’s on a diplomatic mission even more audacious.
Drag likes it.
That’s not the same Vader who is revealed in those open moments of Star Wars.
What, did he pop a valium in between movies and mellow out all the sudden?
All star wars for me is bad. Rogue one at least was cool and for ONCE Vader didn’t looked like a joke to me.
Genuinely curious. How so?
Vader’s argument with Leia goes out the window if he literally watches them fly away with the Death Star Plans.
Same with the argument on the Death Star when he chokes the guy out… “Bitch, I was in the same hallway with them, I just… didn’t grab them… for… reasons.”
