the details aren’t super important and i’m not going to go into particular depth here but, in summary: i am on break. the burnout is quite bad. the “avalanche analogy” is pretty apt for what i’m dealing with here.
if you’ve never heard the “avalanche analogy” before, it is this: no individual snowflake is the problem, but the accumulation in an avalanche is still catastrophic.
individually, nothing i have dealt with so far―technical stuff, users, situations, arguments on here, etc.―have been issues that make me want to not use the site. the accumulation though is currently unbearable, even on this fairly small size. effectively all the time i―or any other admin, for that matter―am on here, i am being constantly paged with things to handle; people to sort out and placate; content to remove; bug issues to delegate; and all while having hundreds of people make contradictory suggestions to me i have to make sense of, balance, and generally hear nonstop while being expected to act like a service worker. it’s pretty draining!
accordingly, i have not logged in for about a week (or really done anything with the site, for that matter) and even thinking about it is exhausting. so things aren’t great. it’s pretty clear i need to extensively step back―which i’ve already been doing because i’d like to actually, eventually use the site i help co-run here again. i don’t feel good about just dipping without saying anything longer than i already have though, hence this post.
i’d ideally like to be back sometime next week, but i obviously can’t promise that. it’ll happen when it happens. please do not page me in the mean time with site stuff―it will be ignored.
thanks
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you’ve been an absolutely wonderful admin. please take all the time you need and come back when you’re ready, if you’re ready; don’t come back too soon and burn out again. take care!
Take time for yourself! You guys deserve it. You’ve had a lot on your plate that you didn’t expect.
Please take care of yourself. We seriously appreciate you and everything you’ve done, same goes for all other staff. This past week has immensely stressful across the lemmyverse and no one blames you at all for needing to tap out from all this. A lot of people are expecting lemmy and lemmy instances to be like reddit 2.0, but that’s just not humanly possible. It also feels like lemmy as a software has had it personally out for beehaw… kind of like a murphy’s law situation.
Will you make me an admin? I have several qualifications such as open PMs and being the first person to reply here.
No.
you have a history of good comments on here and that’s saving you from what would otherwise probably be a permaban. please learn what comedic timing is, man, this is neither funny nor the time nor the place.
Respectfully, I just don’t think this is the right post for this kind of humor.
I commented on your chat thread the other day about getting over burnout myself, so I entirely get how quickly things add up and what that can do to you in addition to the context of daily life that keeps happening as well. You absolutely deserve a break and to just enjoy this thing that you have made massive contributions to on only your own terms for as long as you need. You are a huge part of why I am so enthusiastic about this instance because I identify with your passion for this project. I know how it can look when literally all you are interacting with on a daily basis are the problems (because that’s my job in my career as well), but please know that from the user side this is an incredibly well run and respectful space. Your efforts in setting the tone at critical times is a big part of what we can enjoy now. You have accomplished major and important things here already, and you deserve all the time you need for yourself.
Hey take however much time you need, relax properly and remember that your hard work has not gone unnoticed. You are probably one of the best admins i have seen on social media, ever. You are amazing and deserve some rest!
Hugs. Try to be gentle with yourself. <3
Thanks for the transparency. You’re a great admin!
Breaks are good, I hope you find peace and refreshment off site. I enjoy reading your posts so I hope at some point you are able to return, but I also can understand if it turns out to be too overwhelming in the end. Thanks for all the work you have done.
Well from the first day I joined it’s been evident how much work you do.
Do whatever you need to do, you’re much appreciated here. :)
It’s great that you’ve recognised the burnout and are taking steps to look after yourself. You’ve done a great job on here, as can be seen by the community that’s sprung up here.
Take all the time you need
alyaza (not tagging with the @ symbol as I don’t want this to just become another notification in your inbox pestering you), you have been a true delight thus far in my time interacting with you. Spend as much time away as you need. This instance has a truly excellent administration team, and will be able to take care of beehaw.org for as long as you need to be away. If they can’t, I’m sure there will be people willing to respond to a call to action for more people. Beehaw.org will be okay without you. And don’t try to rush yourself back just because you feel like a couple of weeks should be enough time. I know what it feels like to think you should be able to expect yourself in some specified time window to come back and then when you do you realize it wasn’t enough time. Instead of timeboxing your recovery time, I recommend picking some project that you really want to focus on and returning once that’s done. Maybe it’s drawing something, perhaps it’s writing a short story, possibly it’s hiking one of the triple crown trails in the United States. But let yourself focus on that thing and see how you feel after that project is done.
Anyway.
The point is.
Be good to yourself. Treat yourself with the same empathy you extend to others. You are valuable and worthy of love.
Really sorry to read this. Thank you and kudos for being able to communicate like you did.
I hope you manage to take your time and take care of yourself. From my burnout experience, I can say it’s likely we usually underestimate (by a lot) the amount of time and distance we need before coming back.
Please don’t feel you have to come back next week because you said so, and don’t feel like you owe us anything in terms of communication / visibility - it matters so much less important than giving yourself the healing space and time you need.
I also hope the admin team finds ways to protect themselves.
Take your time and relax as long as you need.
Good job at identifying that you need rest. I historicallly have been so bad at that.
Please go away (gently) and don’t think about us. Nothing that happens here is more important than your health.
