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Track_Shovel to Microblog [email protected]English • 6 months ago

Malaphores

slrpnk.net

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Malaphores

slrpnk.net

Track_Shovel to Microblog [email protected]English • 6 months ago
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  • @[email protected]
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    7•6 months ago

    She looks like she’s been through the run of the mill

  • @[email protected]
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    19•6 months ago

    I had a boss who said:
    “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t suck his ass to make him drink.”
    I… I just… Can’t.

    • @[email protected]
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      4•6 months ago

      Okay, you win the internet for the day. 👍

  • Cris
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    22•
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    6 months ago

    This makes me so happy, thanks for teaching me a word

  • @[email protected]
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    37•6 months ago

    Does the pope shit in the woods?

    • @[email protected]
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      8•6 months ago

      Are bears Catholic?

      • @[email protected]
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        5•6 months ago

        And which one would you rather meet in the middle of a forest?

    • @[email protected]
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      3•6 months ago

      But nobody is around to smell it, does it have an odor?

  • @[email protected]
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    7•6 months ago

    You made my day, now you have to sleep in it

  • David Blue
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    6•6 months ago

    You can’t have your cake.

  • @[email protected]
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    80•6 months ago

    Make like a tree, and get the fuck out

    • @[email protected]
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      5•6 months ago

      Make like a banana and leave.

    • @[email protected]
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      4•6 months ago

      😂 best one so far

      • @[email protected]
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        5•6 months ago

        Check out Boondock Saints, from which this is a quote. Hilarious movies

        • @[email protected]
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          4•6 months ago

          Surely it’s a riff on BTTF’s Biff Tannen right?

          • @[email protected]
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            2•6 months ago

            That’s about as funny as a screen door on a battleship.

            Have a nice trip! See you next winter!

          • @[email protected]
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            2•6 months ago

            Ya know it might be. I never realized on account of only seeing bttf once when I was young, and never any of the sequels.

            In any case, the character that delivers the line in Boondock Saints delivers quite a few malaphors throughout the movie. It’s part of his thing

    • MyTurtleSwimsUpsideDown
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      8•6 months ago

      Whatever bursts your boat.

    • AJMaxwell
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      14•6 months ago

      People in glass houses sink ships

  • @[email protected]
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    66•6 months ago

    That’s a really tough nut to swallow

    • FreshLight
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      2•6 months ago

      Lmao

      You won.

  • @[email protected]
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    21•6 months ago

    i’n not the brightest bulb in the shed, but i sure am the sharpest!

  • @[email protected]
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    3•6 months ago

    Me when I say I’ll meet new people: we’ll burn that bridge when we get to it.

  • @[email protected]
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    16•6 months ago

    Those that live in glass houses can throw the first stone.

    • @[email protected]
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      10•6 months ago

      Don’t throw glasses in a stone house.

  • Orbituary
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    15•6 months ago

    Malaphors? I call these Rickyisms.

    • @[email protected]
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      17•6 months ago

      It’s all water under the fridge.

      • Orbituary
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        8•6 months ago

        Exactly. Making these things up ain’t rocket appliances.

        • @[email protected]
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          10•6 months ago

          And there’s so many out there already you can use the existing ones and teach others; get two birds stoned at once

    • @[email protected]
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      8•6 months ago

      Worse case Ontario I get to tell you I toad a so, I fuckin a toad a so.

    • @[email protected]
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      8•6 months ago

      • NSRXN
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        4•6 months ago

        A toad a sow.

    • @[email protected]
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      10•6 months ago

      Rickyisms are modern day malapropisms, named for Mrs Malaprop from the 1775 play The Rivals by Sheridan, rather than malaphors.

      The difference being a malaphor is a mixed up idiom like the examples in the post and a malapropism is substituting a word in a common saying or idiom for a similar sounding one. For example, “finding an escape goat” or “I resemble that remark”.

      • Orbituary
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        3•6 months ago

        “Why don’t you make like tree and fuck off, Lahey!” -Ricky

        (I know the difference, I was just attempting to be silly with it all.)

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 🏆
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    36•
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    6 months ago

    A bird in the hand is worth its weight in gold.

    Icarus flew too close to the man in the moon.

    Find a penny, pick it up. Would you like some making fuck?

    • @[email protected]
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      16•6 months ago

      BERSERKER!

      Outstanding, friend. Got a laugh out of me.

  • @[email protected]
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    10•6 months ago

    You can lead a whore to water, but you can’t make her douche.

    • Orbituary
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      5•6 months ago

      I spit my drink. Oh well, it’s water under the fridge.

      • @[email protected]
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        2•6 months ago

        🎵 Under the fridge downtown is where I chewed some cud!

  • @[email protected]
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    6•6 months ago

    For those of you speaking German: Hast du enen Scherzkeks gefrühstückt?

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