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      71 month ago

      Only if you are thinner than 7" minus the thickness of the door. Otherwise, you would teleport right into the door, which (I assume) might be quite painful.

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          1 month ago

          You can just teleport 7 inches backwards after lunch. As the contents of your stomach isn’t you, it will stay inert and fall to the floor. You can eat all you want if you don’t have to digest it.

          Just remember to stand up beforehand or you’ll end up intermingled with your chair having chewed up cheeseburger all over your lap.

  • AItoothbrush
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    131 month ago

    A manga artist would find a way to make one of these the most op power in their entire universe. “I can fill anyones lungs with gravel with just a thought” or " i teleported 5 cms into you and severed a nerve in your spine that paralyzes you for life"

  • @[email protected]
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    181 month ago

    Number seven. And then piss off every “pea under shell” trickster, because you can see which shells are empty.

  • @[email protected]
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    1 month ago

    Number 7 might let you cheat at some carnival/gambling games. Which of these 1000 boxes has the million dollars in it? The one I can’t see through, of course!

  • @[email protected]
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    321 month ago

    Gravel ofc. Just imagine being able to provide every construction site on earth with cheap gravel with no cost at all. I’d be the first billionaire on earth who didn’t fuck other people over to be absurdly rich.

    • @[email protected]
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      91 month ago

      Thought the same thing but it doesn’t say how the gravel is obtained. I assume there’s still going to be transportation costs and “life” could be as short as how long it takes to be smothered by a heap of free gravel. I am suspicious.

  • MrMobius
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    141 month ago

    I’m torn. Kinda curious about what oysters are thinking, but pretty sure Einstein could run faster than me.

    • @[email protected]
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      61 month ago

      It doesn’t specify Einstein’s age. Plus this ability would be priceless for people in wheelchairs.

      • MrMobius
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        41 month ago

        Didn’t think about the wheelchair thing, good point. Anyway, I got a shitty cardio, during most of his time on earth, old Albert who have beaten me in a 100m sprint.

  • @[email protected]
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    301 month ago

    3 for sure. Depending on how teleporting into other objects works, and how fast you can spam it, you could get some serious work done with a power like that.

    • Coriza
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      31 month ago

      When you play Noita you discover that the way to move fast is to teleport shorter distance possible and spam it. It is also better for avoiding obstacles

  • @[email protected]
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    571 month ago

    Gravel is expensive if you’re doing a lot of landscaping. I’ll supply all of the entrepeneurs in the area and make a fortune.

    • @[email protected]
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      221 month ago

      For real, free gravel for life is the choice. You can start a gravel business and sell that shit. According to Google a 100ft driveway can cost upwards of $3k to gravel.

      • @[email protected]
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        121 month ago

        The real question is, does free gravel mean you can spawn gravel? Or buy it for free? Both require a good amount of logistical planning to take advantage of to build a gravel empire

        • @[email protected]
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          21 month ago

          The logistics isn’t that much of a problem. Start small and make yourself a name by being trustworthy and way cheaper than the competition. If you succeed at this stage you can hire people and expand in no time.

      • @[email protected]
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        11 month ago

        With a 12ft width, that’s about 15-18” subbase, which is overkill. Wondering if that $3k includes installation.

    • @[email protected]
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      1 month ago

      I cannot tell you how many ways free gravel for life would help me, but it’s definitely a lot

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      But if it’s free, you can’t sell it. Otherwise it would no longer be free.

      EDITH: I’m surprised how many downvotes your getting for posting a shit post in a shitposting community :-D

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          41 month ago

          In order to do that I’d have to take 💊 № 1 though, so I’d be able to communicate with people who are sℏellfish.

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          61 month ago

          In a world where some people can control toasters with their mind, free gravel disappears as soon as you put a price tag on it. I’m sorry if you don’t like that, but I don’t make the rules.

          • @[email protected]
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            101 month ago

            I don’t make the rules.

            Really? Because that rule wasn’t in the original question and you just made it up.

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              21 month ago

              The original question also doesn’t state that gravity attracts everything but oysters or that Albert Einstein has two runny noses. But that’s how it is. These are just the basic rules of the fantasy pill world. Everybody knows that (at least I thought so).

  • @[email protected]
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    401 month ago

    Number three will get you through most all fences, walls, and locked doors. Become ungovernable.

    • @[email protected]
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      241 month ago

      Hopefully it’s a7 inch gap, if it’s 7 inches from center mass you’re not really fully shifting position.

      • @[email protected]
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        91 month ago

        And the minute you do it wrong you’ve fused with a fence or a steel door or something and are probably dead so it would require a ton of practice to know your limits

        • @[email protected]
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          21 month ago

          What you gotta do is carry a small object and hold it in front of you, and then teleport forward and back so that the object goes into and out of the lock, breaking it.

        • @[email protected]
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          1 month ago

          Being able to teleport into a region already containing air without creating a nuclear blast requires that you can already either instantly displace the air in the target region (which would make a Very Loud Noise) or switch places with it, so there are possible interpretations of the power where teleporting into a fence would leave behind a detached section of fence or bend it out of your way

          • @[email protected]
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            11 month ago

            I think I’m normal teleporting scenarios it doesn’t allow you to teleport into ‘objects’, though obviously there has to be some exception for air or it’s basically worthless. I don’t think I’ve ever seen any scenario where you displace anything other than gas?

            • @[email protected]
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              11 month ago

              You would still need to be able to displace suspended particles, bacteria, and small insects, otherwise you wouldn’t be able to teleport outside of a clean room

              • @[email protected]
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                True, but have you ever seen it depicted where someone transported into a solid object wasnt basically killed? Outside of whatever mechanism somehow explains the background air/insects/etc?

                My guess is that easily movable things are explained by some vague bubble or displacement mechanism where the transported person/object starts as a point and as long as the medium is compressible or movable, things just shift out of the way to make room. As long as it’s not instantaneous, and the object isn’t gigantic, there’s no risk of moving into to area to fast and at most there is some air movement associated with the shift.

                The alternative is that the displaced environment trades places with the transported object, so the air/bugs/parts of the wall show up where the person/object transported from. Guessing this mechanism isn’t since it opens up a lot of options like using it for mining or kidnapping/theft/etc.

          • @[email protected]
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            11 month ago

            True, so I guess in this case the possibility would be that you could get stuck in an object by displacing it, but by continuously displacing, theoretically you could get unstuck

            • @[email protected]
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              11 month ago

              You could pass through anything as long as you’re willing to destroy it in the process

              If you work in demolition you could take out a wall by continuously teleporting through it, if you wanted to do typical superhero stuff it would be good in a fight but nonlethal attacks aren’t really an option

              • @[email protected]
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                True, though this doesn’t cover whether you’d feel the effects of the teleportation, or I guess also how fast you could teleport. Teleporting through air is probably not crazy, but if only every atom of you teleports into solid steel or rock, you’ll basically be stuck for as long as your brain takes to process the next teleportation. If you don’t do it with a full breath you can’t breath in, your hairs might get stuck from tiny muscle movements, if your eyes are open, they are now just touching rock or steel, I think it would require some practice to know the right like “body preparation” to do without harming yourself.

  • @[email protected]
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    91 month ago

    How does the free gravel thing work? Can I just summon it in a location of my choice? Or is there a guy who delivers it to me?

  • Zelaf
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    81 month ago

    Speaking a dead language would be cool. Maybe teach it to others and read into the history, etymology and people of it. Talk to historians and what not.

  • @[email protected]
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    481 month ago

    Would need the details on some of these.

    • The empty container depends on the definition of “container” and “empty”. If a house is a container for people it’s easy to rob when empty. If you have to be looking at an airless vacuum it’s dogshit. Otherwise I’m sure you could make money with a creative gambling scheme.
    • Gravel for life, like an infinite bucket full? Or the typical “for life” shit where you just get one trailer full dumped in your driveway every year for 60 years. Probably an overrated pick.
    • Teleporting is almost certainly the best pick. Is there a cool down? Do you keep momentum? Can it be in any direction? Does it take the same effort as walking? If you can spam it at the speed thought, you’re now flying. Even with a CD you could be a world class athlete in a lot of sports. Or just do simple stuff like reach a high shelf or teleport out of handcuffs.
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      Or just do simple stuff like reach a high shelf or teleport out of handcuffs.

      Teleporting out of you handcuffs also implies you’d lose your clothes every time you teleport.

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          221 month ago

          Usually bodies are more than 7 inches wide, so you wouldn’t end up naked, but with a t-shirt somewhere inside your body. So if it works like that, I’d advise you not to choose that pill. That is, unless you’re an oyster.

  • DudeImMacGyver
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    121 month ago

    Teleporting 7 inches still sounds kinda badass, would be very useful in a fight or you could just stand and repeatedly teleport to recreate that OK GO video.