If you’re not middle aged, pick a younger age, IDK
“You were right and the guidance counselors were wrong.”
I have no memory of what mine said… But yeah, in my experience people who start out one one path and switch on to a totally different one often seem like more interesting and well rounded and happy people. I imagine guidance counselling would often be nearly impossible. At least in the sense of suggesting a career path - I guess just answering questions could still be really useful.
I just wanted them to place me better classes. They were convinced I would be happier, or more likely, their job easier, if I was placed in all remedial classes. This is despite testing advanced proficient for science and average for math and despite my grade school recommending me for advance placement for science.
I was never interested in talking to them about career paths or any of the other “American Dream” lies. I wanted to do something good for the world with my years in college. They fucking hate that.
Wow, that sounds like some bullshit. I’m in Aus, and though I said I can’t remember it, I feel like it wasn’t that completely useless here. Or maybe it was for some.
Maybe that’s because “the Australian Dream” (if it exists), is going to the beach and drinking beer 😆
Wait so I still get to do this as a career? And I’m considered an expert in the field?!?
Yea that makes sense about my knees and back hurting.
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I can’t believe we pulled it off holy shit we are good.
Probably;
- I’m proud. You proved everyone that you were able to do everything, they said you could not (education-wise).
- Don’t be afraid to change jobs, get the one that’s better for your future.
“What kind of career strategy was ‘go with the flow’, old man? Oh, but it worked out ok? Good to know.”
Bahaha, this for me too, so much.
Probably a fair bit of middle class white male privilege in action for me - I’ve got a lot of community and family to be greatful for.
My 19 year old self would be sad and hopefully take a different path.
She would be absolutely stunned. Probably wouldn’t believe me. At 43 I’m married to the guy I was dating at 19. At 19 I had dropped out of college and thought I wanted to be an artist; at 43 I’m already retired from a successful career in academic research. At 19 I had no thoughts about politics or the world as a whole (9/11 hadn’t happened yet); at 43 I’m pretty informed and opinionated. And she’d probably be surprised how much I’m into the outdoors, healthy living, and weightlifting, given that she had negative interest in those things. The rest is pretty consistent - e.g., I’ve always loved music from the '60s, fun nail polish, scifi, swimming, and handmade art (drawing, beading, etc).
I mean the math checks out, but holy crap, you’re 43, but at 19 ‘9/11 hadn’t happened yet…’
Fuck yeah. Sounds like a great trajectory!
Mine would say: What? You’re working with finance people? WTF? Traitor!
But if I explained it a bit more, I reckon they’d be pretty into it, and kind of impressed.
Her??
“Yeah you probably should have jumped off that bridge”.
:(
Are you OK? Have you got access to some kind of therapy?
I’m fine.
I’ve been in and out of therapy most of my life. Therapists are useless (for me). Not once have they told me something I didn’t already know. I know why I respond to things the way I do. I know where the trauma started. I know what copeing mechanism I’ve developed and how they can effect relationships.
Keeping a journal doesn’t help. Meditation doesn’t help. All the various other bullshit they have tried since I was a kid have been terrible.
Medication makes my brain feel like molasses which makes me wanna step into oncoming traffic even more so than normal.
It is what it is.
That sucks dude. I hope some change shows up for you at some point.
Unlikely.
If I didn’t have friends and family it would hurt I would have done it years ago.
I won’t do that to all of them though. I didn’t jump off that bridge after all. So for now I just kinda pray a random accident kills me instantly. I don’t wanna be a vegetable that they have to take care of, but if a brain aneurysm or some other act of God takes me out that would be whatever.
We’d probably not get along very well. 19 y/o me though he saw the world “logically” and that everyone else was wrong. He saw emotions as a weakness, and interpreted the world as black and white. To him everything seemed clear cut and simple, and everyone who didn’t agree was an idiot.
Seeing nuance and accepting emotions as a valid argument to anything are not things he’d accept. Accepting that people who think differently are not completely stupid might not go well with him. And, without getting into details, I don’t think he’d agree with the current situation. He wouldn’t be surprised to see me work as a programmer, but his black and white thinking wouldn’t gel very well with the reality that most companies aren’t exactly “good” causes.
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I can make it on my own?? I can’t believe you have your life so well put together. I like cats better than dogs now?
I was studying computer science then, and I’m working as a software engineer now, so probably just as expected. Probably thought I would have gotten married and had kids younger but otherwise life has been…boring
