Edit: It will never cease to make me laugh that I get more genuinely serious discussion comments on my meme posts in /c/Memes than anywhere else. I’m not hating, I love it.
Edit 2: Chicago-Style deep dish pizza isn’t pizza go fuck yourself
As a sophisticated man of discriminating taste and impeccable manners, I eat these crazy tall burgers with a knife and fork. Just kidding, I use a knife and fork because they are too tall for my mouth and too messy for my beard.
A beard is for enjoying leftovers later. Get with the program, beardo.
In my boyfriend’s hometown they used to have this restaurant that served this thing called a hubcap burger
And it was indeed, wide enough to be the hubcap of a car, while being basically flat.
There was a Hubcap Grill in Houston that had the best burger in a city that has a lot of great burgers.
They say they named it that because of a method of cooking a burger on a skillet, where you place a metal plate over the beef as it cooks to reduce splattering. The joke was that the burgers were so big that they needed to use a hubcap instead of a plate. And it was pretty close to true. Those burgers were massive and incredible.
They still have a few locations, including one in Hobby airport. But the original, which was a hole in the wall in downtown Houston, was the best.
I mean… I’m hungry…
Where’s the address?
Southern Brazil.
Fuck
Epic road trip time, let’s do this
Harold and Kumar go to Florianópolis.
Well I’m on an island in the ocean in Canada and with no car. You coming to pick me up?
Alternatively, I’ve had something similar on holiday in South Tyrol.
I get bigger burgers not for more food but for more satisfying bites. A tall stacked smash burger or a juicy pink tall burger are way more satisfying to bite into
Three or four patties do not make a big burger, in my opinion they begin at 8 stacked, or at least a kilo if it is a single patty. You’re describing a regular snack of a burger. I want all of the fixins too.
It’s true. I’m a bartender. When I serve a drink in a to-go cup I sometimes get people bitching “oh, that’s all I get?” and then I passive aggressively demonstrate to them that it’s the same as it would be in a pint glass but it’s just shorter and wider.
Don’t fucking people do anything for themselves anymore. I mean this is like a service economy right so everybody’s just going around wiping each other’s buttholes and passing Around 20 bucks… Just like having to explain the most elementary things, you know, it’s just ridiculous. Like having you ever just like drank whiskey out of like any fucking thing you can find. But then you’re trying to be responsible and you measure it out. But then you end up drinking like half or all the bottle. Clearly, in a normal cup, a shot of whiskey looks like nothing.
It’s fucked up, because those same people will buy a daiquiri without second thought.
If they wanted a good deal, they should have stayed at home and drank alone in the basement. Works for me.
Just go snake mode and unhinge your jaw.
I mean, humans completely suck at evaluating vertical distances, thinking that
taller = moreis just further evidence, I’d sayIt’s not a comparison of size, it’s just the formatting of the sandwich to fit better with the way the human jaw is made… What a dumb argument
But wider = more taste surface. See smash burgers. Taller is just… more burger to toppings ratio. Diminishing returns, imo.
Until it ends up the thickness of a piece of paper like the Whopper.
So the ideal burger is basically the size and shape of a pancake.
A quesadilla.
I went into Applebee’s the other day and saw a quesadilla burger on the menu… I didn’t get it because I didn’t want a burger, but it did look really good.
Smashburgers are about hijaking the Maillard reaction. Thinner meat means more browning.
Unless taller adds additional burgers to the burger. Got this place in my town, they serve their burgers with 2 150g patties. Great stuff!
Wider means you get more of the same, taller means you can get more ingredients. If I order a burger with all the fixings, I’d rather a tall burger than lettuce to one side and onion to the other.
I agree that you can get more ingredients, but I can fit a lot of ingredients in a burger that doesn’t have to be a mile high. I don’t want a quarter inch (6+mm) of red onion on a burger. I don’t want a giant piece of lettuce like you mentioned. I don’t need thick tomatoes either.
Not that we should eat this, but I can go toasted Brioche bun, light BBQ sauce, 1/5 pound pattie, pulled pork mixed with Mac and Cheese, caramelized onions, light BBQ drizzle, toasted top brioche bun and that’s a lot to put on a burger but it can be done easily without your mouth having to be unhinged to bite into it. Someone will probably tell me to throw cheese in there, because we Americans are hurting for a heart attack, but still easily doable.
AKA people are idiots.
Never forget that the 1/3 pounder failed because people were too dumb to realize that 1/3 is bigger than 1/4…
Bad labeling, they should have called it the 150. People will assume that means 50% more, which is kinda close. For any legal matter they can say it refers to 150 grams, which is dead accurate.
Right up until the point that someone complains that grams are metric and not American, calling for a boycott. It makes my head hurt.
Would never have happened if 'murica used metrics lol
Never looked at metric as (also) accommodating idiots, but I guess you’re right.
well they’re already wider.
We’d have the 200 gram’er or whatever a quarter of a pound is in grams
Like 115 grams. A pound is 454g, a quarter of that is 113.5g, which would probably be rounded up.
They’d go from a Royale with cheese to an Impérial with cheese.
In Germany, we have 125g patties. But a pound is slang for 500g and does not equate to an imperial pound.
They should’ve made a fifth-pounder and sold it for more.
The vast majority of people do not understand fractions. Even math teachers do not understand fractions. I quiver in horror every time a student says the words “cross multiply” because I am about to see some gruesome debasement of mathematics.
I had to remind myself exactly what the point of cross multiplying is.
…it’s essentially just a label given to a specific set of algebraic operations. That it even has a name seems stupid to me. We shouldn’t focus on memorizing specific cases like this when understanding why it works will get you there just as quickly. Heck in the case of cross multiplying, I think it works against the interests of the students’ learning. It’s a shortcut that hides the fact that you’re multiplying both sides by both denominators, when “do the same thing on both sides of the equals sign” is algebra 101.
Exactly. The problem is that they will also start “cross multiplying” any time they see a fraction. “Okay, so what do I need to do if I want to add 3/4 + 1/3?” And then they’ll say “cross multiply”?
Just say - “hey, the way to get rid of the denominators is to multiply everything by the LCD.” Then it works in all cases. No weird “one trick” that doesn’t really teach them anything.
(But, where I live - the people teaching math don’t understand math lol.)
AKA Volumes are unintuitive. Always get your martinis filled to the brim. https://youtu.be/Mkn3PzdaByY
This isn’t volumes though, it’s basically asking if you’ve ever experienced a liquid affected by gravity. And somehow adults are failing this.
Broke: Intuitive responses may not be accurate and experimental experience is necessary to enjoy a fuller understanding of the world
Woke: People are idiots
Bespoke: Andrew Tate Voice
A 1995 experiment found that 50% of undergraduate males and 25% of females performed “very well” on the task and 20% of males and 35% of females performed “poorly”.
followed by a series of extremely misogynist noises
Burgers should neither be taller nor wider. Just give me two normal sized burgers.
How about you unhinge your jaw like your little sister
Or eight. I have a large appetite. I’m only 10kg overweight. Honestly, a monster burger sounds pretty good too. I have eaten a few challenge burgers (and won) but the ones that are ten patties tall, you have to dismantle them to eat them. I support wider burgers. But every topping needs to be all across the thing or they are just serving lazy garbage.
Food for thought: a sufficiently tall and narrow burger ain’t a burger anymore, when it’s roughly spherical rather than roughly cylindrical it’s also not a burger and if it’s large and brick-like it’s yet something else.
spoiler
Cevapcici Kofta; Meatball; Meatloaf.
So burger is a geometrically bound dish definition.
Meatloaf and meatballs have things like egg and breadcrumbs mixed in, and don’t tend to come on buns.
People who put such things in their hamburger patties are eating meatloaf sandwiches, not hamburgers.
Hah! Joke’s on you: you haven’t seen my cooking!
a sufficiently tall and narrow burger ain’t a burger anymore
It’s a hotdog.
Nah. If you put two plates in front of me and one had a regular burger on it and the other had a burger that was as wide as the plate itself, I’d pick the one that most accurately reflects how much I hate myself at that moment.
Schlotzky’s proved this out decades ago.
I’d eat em both
I mean it worked for subway. Until they started skimping
you mean the 11" footlong?
Maybe it was cold
cold cut?
Their success came from it being specifically longer. It’s much harder to visualise a bigger surface area, like how a 10 inch pizza is bigger than two 7 inch pizzas. Subway on the other hand only stretches it in one axis, so the number goes up faster.
I don’t want long burgers, although I don’t know why. Big fan of the circle.
Some poboy shops here sell a long burger. My gym buddy used to regularly eat the 8 patty footlong double. Must have been a pound of meat on it, never mind the cheese and other toppings.
It’s easy, just call it something different, like a chopped cheese.
Size factors are tricky and the issue with fractional weights. I say we make wider Burger circles and number then in onces in the USA and grammes in the rest of the world. I want my 200 Burger and my 400 Burger wide.
Roy’s once had the bodacious bacon cheeseburger. It was pretty lit.
It was 1/3 of a pound and elongated.
The form factor is not bad it’s like the original chicken sandwich from Burger King.
I come from a country where burgers get wider, not taller.
which one?
