Anhedonia?

It’s do with living in the moment vs spending your time thinking about what you did or worrying about what the future might bring, IMHO.

We become way more prone to spend our time doing things like thinking about stuff we did (and how we miss it if it was good or could’ve done it better if it was bad) and worrying about what the future can bring (and not necessarily in grand terms: somethingas simple as “I have to get a haircut” which then goes one to “when will I have the time”, then “but I need that time for X” and so on) as we grow older.

You absolutelly can still have some moments of wonder (for things as simple as how a cobweb looks with droplets of morning mist on it) but you need to be present there in mind also, not just in body, and not to not let some memory or concern rush in to take your mental attention away from the now.

I had a point in my life with a ton of anxiety and ended up learning Mindfulness (which is simply to try and not say anything to yourself in your mind, which is surprisingly hard to do for more than a few seconds) to stop the feeling (if you’re not constantly looking back to something bad or fearing for something bad in the future you don’t feel anxious about those things) and as a side effect I ended up with the habit of being more often present in the moment and that’s how you just enjoy little wonders when you come across them.

Still, it’s nowhere at the level one has as a kid.

Firstly I just want to say that this is really interesting post and I love that you’ve asked this question. Secondly, as someone who experienced child abuse I don’t know where to even start in answering this question because as an adult I’m now in a space where I can actually feel my feelings and express them safely.

I think life is maybe similar to being in a long term relationship. There are times when every little thing life does annoys you or times where it’s just eh and you realise you need to actively spice things up. And then there are times when you are completely overcome by joy thinking about how much you love life, how much you’ve been through together, and how excited you are to spend the rest of your lives together.

If you’re looking for a suggestion on spicing things up I highly recommended jumping into some existential philosophy. It’s like the intellectual equivalent of a roller coaster I guess.

Man, I don’t know, but this post was beautifully crafted, you sir are a poet.

I’m sure it also has something to do with that when you get older, you’ve had those experiences many more times than as a child. They just don’t feel that specia anymore.l

Short comment because mobile: You’ve described a thing I’ve been thinking about and grasping to get back since maybe two or three years. Thank you.

Well firstly your senses do start dulling (eyesight, hearing), and secondly you have way more context on the world itself (the mortgage bond, climate change, pollution, family responsibilities, social media trolls, the fragility of bones and life, etc). So I suppose your brain is less focussed on the moment, and you’ve got a bit cynical about life ;-)

I accept that the way I looked at life and moments at 15, 25 and 50 are fairly different. Decisions I took at 25 were right for me then, but today I would have decided differently, but then I would not be where I am today either.

I recently read that in a neurotypical human being, the succession of two experiences only has a big impact on brain activity for the first experience, while the second makes a smaller spike. In psychotic patients on the other hand, the impression makes two equally large spikes both times. In the experiment, the experience was hearing a ballpoint pen click. So maybe being dulled to former experience is important for the brain to function properly, just a side effect of our natural brain filter.

I understand what you mean, I have the same feeling - everything is a but less vivid now.

I am no expert, but my guess that is happening because you have much more experience with the world now. As we age, the number of things that will be completely new to us becomes smaller and smaller. We just have more experience, and even if we haven’t seen/felt/heard something particular, chances are, that your brain still won’t be completely surprised - it will be able to find some experiences that you have which are close to that new thing.

But when you are a kid - there is a whole world of things you didn’t experience at all or didn’t experience enough to understand fully. That’s why everything was so vivid - there was a lot of “truly” new experiences.

Fully recommend the psychedelics BUT it’s not for everyone.

Practice mindfulness through meditation.

Psychedelics do what that does but does so through explosive force, lol.

Mindfulness is so fundamentally critical to feeling alive again. That breeze still exists. The sound of the cicadas buzzing away is still there. The scent of rain still permeates.

Meditation isn’t going “ohmmmmm🧘”. It’s a practice of clearing your mind, and living through your senses. Discerning your existence through means other than thought.

When you were a kid, you didn’t have the capacity to only think like you do now. You were jumping between thought and raw sensory analysis. You were both free and grounded through your senses.

It’s about finding a balance that as a kid you couldn’t obtain, and that as an adult you have forsaken.

Good luck friend. Just know that you can get back to that.

Edit: I’d like to add that you practice until it’s second nature, and you become much more aware as a result. You won’t need to stop to smell those roses - they will grab your attention.

I can only speak from personal experience, but I feel much the same way you do. However, novelty still does it for me. And I think that’s the explanation for the gradual drop-off. When you’re young, everything is new. By the time you’re older, you’ve seen it all, and so those little spikes of novelty are few and far between.

It’s kind of the opposite for me. Like many people said, when you are young, every experience mostly feels new. However, when everything feels new to you, there’s really nothing special about it. For me, I always embraced the familiar. I look back at my memories of family vacations with disappointment, because as everyone else was wanting to go and do fun things, I was complaining about how I would rather be watching TV or playing my gameboy. Now as an adult, I understand how precious our experiences can be. I look out at a mountain and I appreciate the beauty of it. I think about the history that has taken place around it. I think about how other people might have experienced it. I get so much more from it than I ever would have as a child.

Do shrooms that feeling will come right back

Yeah, it is normal, but it also sounds like depression.

Hey OP, a lot of people are suggesting psilocybin or other psychedelics. If you’re interested you can ask questions about that in the [email protected] community. I moderate it but there are psychonauts there that know about this stuff who are friendly and helpful.