I hate scrum

I hate stand up

I hate sprints

Fuck Toyota

How have we taken the most autistic job and tacked a stupid, worthless, autistic unfriendly process on to it? (the answer of course is capitalism)

I want to quit but I can’t get another job and even if I could it would just be more of this shit.

  • @[email protected]English
    36•6 months ago

    My previous job had daily 30-60 minute “stand ups” and weekly 2+ hour sprint planning meetings.

    It’s not “proper” agile/scrum/whatever, but in my experience it never is. No agile plan survives contact with the enemy (management).

    • SevenSkalls [he/him]English
      19•6 months ago

      Ya some new coworker said we weren’t doing proper Agile in this new team I joined many months ago and luckily they’re audio-only calls because I’m pretty sure I rolled my eyes so hard. Never seen truly “proper” agile in my life. There’s always some twist to account for some customer demands or something. And tbh, that’s probably how it should be.

      • blame [they/them]English
        15•6 months ago

        i dont think there’s really such a thing as “proper” agile and im almost certain ive seen some quote from the guy that invented the term saying as much. it’s a bunch of things your team can do or not do depending on how it works. At my job im on a few different teams and one of them does the 2 week sprint planning + jira board thing but no standups. The other teams dont even bother with jira, just have weekly status meetings and people mostly know what they’re going to do and do it.

      • SoyViking [he/him]English
        4•6 months ago

        In my experience the thing that keeps the amount of “Agile” rituals down is management looking at how long it takes and realising that they’re not making any money while everybody is at meetings.