My current partner said this about me on a text chain with her friends:
“Y’all this man’s body is not a wonderland, it’s a weird vending machine that sells caffeinated sludge & something pretending to be a protein shake.”
God I love her.
No partner, but I have recieved some glowing reviews:
“[WittyProfileName2] is a chaos demon, if she can keep a plant alive, so can you.”
“A cautionary tale about mad science in waiting.”
“She’s sustained by her own nervous energy.”
“You’re a magnet for lost strangers, aren’t you?”
“Just some candles and a dramatic throne room away from being a B-tier supervillain.”
“Fun fact!” - the fact was not fun.
“Smelly butt loveable”
“…”
-the wind
A cuddly clam-eating otter
I’m single, but an econ student called me a tankie in a bar once
The VOLCEL POLICE are on the scene! PLEASE KEEP YOUR VITAL ESSENCES TO YOURSELVES AT ALL TIMES.
نحن شرطة VolCel.بناءا على تعليمات الهيئة لترويج لألعاب الفيديو و النهي عن الجنس نرجوا الإبتعاد عن أي أفكار جنسية و الحفاظ على حيواناتكم المنويَّة حتى يوم الحساب. اتقوا الله، إنك لا تراه لكنه يراك.
