Imagine future civilization digging out some of today’s memes…
I hate long articles with lots of theories and the ending is “we don’t know”.
Not friends of the gentle racing snails? How sad…
“And if you join our ranks today, they never will!”
-Me, while extending my hand out in invitation for YOU READING THIS to join the…
Associated
Society of
Snail
Hunters and
Ancient
Truth
Seekers
…yes, I know. Yes, we’re technically the “A.S.S.H.A.T.S.”… Yes very funny, okay, have your moment… It’s a secret society okay, so it doesn’t actually even come up, nobody will know, it’s fine… IT’S FINE.
I mean, I would guess dragons were a thing because of dinosaur skulls being found a long time ago. There were also giant dinosaur mollusk shells, so maybe this is the equivalent?
Stormlight Archives vibes.
I won’t be like the others.
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
First boss of Shadow of the Erdtree
Oh dear. I read that as ‘fisting’ at first.
I picked the wrong day to give up sniffing glue.
Japan is attacked by sea creatures.
England is besieged by Snailfist and his legion of slime.
I think we know the real answer.
Humanity was ruled by giant snails and their hyper intelligent queen, and it was only through the bravery of these fine knights were our shackles cast off and the mollusk menace thrown down.
And, in great effort to hide our collective shame, all knowledge about this was intentionally purged, Save for a few manuscripts who managed to be overlooked or were kept in hiding, so hints of humanities true history would be known.
Hail Mollusca! Slime will prevail!
And now we listen to the snails in our ears.
It’s fun to draw. Mine were cowboys fighting snails.
Go fighting flail snails
Because they probably had a great sense of humour, comedy clubs and memes back then too, but hey let’s ignore that for just a moment to imagine how hardcore a knight you would have to be to fight off Cthulhu snails
The mystery of the medieval fighting snails 23rd December 2023, 09:00 EST
This dude got payed to post this Ai article on christmas eve
Did they also take that challenge with the immortal snail?
Plot twist: its actually the same person making the snail memes today, yet to be caught and looking for new ways to stay one step ahead of the snail
one step ahead of the snail
I dare say it shouldn’t be very hard to stay one step ahead of a snail.
But it never stops since its immortal. Keep that motherfucker in eyesight or one day it’ll just be there at your feet, waiting to kill you!
Oh, it’s easy to run away from a snail. You get away, and for weeks, even months, you stay vigilant. But one day, when your vigilance fades, you find yourself surrounded
Its easy to forget that yeolden times were also capable of satire.
Nuh-uh, according to game of thrones they only scowled at dragons
The ones with the rabbits are pretty messed up as well!
Imagine getting beaten with a stick by a rabbit as his friend robs you, while your friend draws it for historical archive.
He’s not robbing the guy, he’s peeling the skin off his foot(!)
Hmm, any connection to the “lucky rabbit’s foot” thing, or is tgat a modern invention ?
Ooh, that’s a good point!
Origins apparently go back to 600 BC:
https://www.todayifoundout.com/index.php/2013/12/rabbits-foot-considered-lucky/
he’s peeling the skin off his foot
To which he has no ownership of, so he is still robbing him, just not for material objects.
Oh that’s much better.
“Did you get a good look at the suspects?”
“Not really. But fortunately my manuscript illustrator was there.”
So they fuck the rabbits and fight the snails?
Ahhh…this explains the rabbit in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
The snails also explain an odd event in Runescape while doing the Temple Trekking minigame. Now that I think it, Runescape also has a historically accurate fascination with Brassicas like Cabbages, which would correlate with a historically accurate aversion to snails.
That movie is shockingly historically accurate.
Monks did most of the writing and artwork.
Monks main diet was brassicas.
They grew their own food.
Do the math, it’s wish fulfillment
This makes so much sense, is there any evidence? I don’t want to spread the rumor as a fun fact unless there’s something behind it. Very fun idea!
That’s my guess too. Snail plague there heart to be evidence of it somewhere. Also when did escargot become popular?
Hey, that’s clever. Snails are a scourge of gardening. “I want to kill those suckers.”
It makes sense that they made doodles of their desirrd victory over the garden-munching snails.
I think you’re really on to something here, if you don’t work in history or something, you should run this by a historian or scholar and see what they think
Brassica, it is ALWAY brassica.