• @[email protected]
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    110 months ago

    Why don’t they just keep working from home and get fired? Instead of having to quit themselves?

  • @[email protected]
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    310 months ago

    Yet another thinly veiled stealth lay-off by a technology company. Amazon’s cloud boss Matt “The Prat” Garman will indeed see some departures, as intended and desired. However, that first wave will be of their most talented, who feel confident they will land on their feet elsewhere, leaving those that simply cannot leave (yet) or those that will cozily under perform. When Amazon applies the inevitable followup reductions (subjectively based on their internal review process) to remove the latter, and the former buckle under the load or also leave, Amazon will be left with lower-middle talent at best.

    The more I see of business “strategy” among this layer of “leadership”, the more I’m convinced it is just a game of Jenga with talent, resources, infrastructure, security, quality, etc; pulling out as many pieces as possible in the drive for short term/sighted gains until a company collapses under its own dysfunctional “efficiency” and “success”.

    • @[email protected]
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      110 months ago

      This is absolutely it. The C-suite and senior management are made up of sharp people. They absolutely know this will trigger an exodus and a large bag of fire-able workers. They don’t care that they’re likely to lose a bunch of talented, hardworking staff. Its all been accounted for. At worst the results of a mass exodus will only impact their bottom line in a few years. They just need this years numbers to look good and line to go up.

  • @[email protected]
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    18310 months ago

    Well, yeah. Isn’t the whole point of these foolish office mandates to get people to quit? That way they can reduce their workforce without the cost and negative press of another round of layoffs.

    • @[email protected]
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      3410 months ago

      negative press

      pretty fucked up that quiet firing via RTO bullshit is less negative press than just laying people off

      • @[email protected]
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        110 months ago

        It’s just less visible/explicit. It’s still bad press when it gets noticed and called out like in this thread, it’s just sneakier.

    • gian
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      2110 months ago

      Probably. But this way you have no control on who quit, with a good probability that are the better ones.

      • @[email protected]
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        710 months ago

        True, but execs see statistics, not people. And maybe it’s cheaper to rehire the good ones with a higher salary than deal with severance packages.

    • @[email protected]
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      10 months ago

      Go into the office and waste every resource you can.

      Plug in a fan + heater + aquarium + massage pad at your desk and leave everything on constantly even when you leave

      Print every email and throw it in the trash.

      Make coffee 50x a day and pour it down the sink

      Flush a whole roll of TP every hour

      Leave sinks on in the bathroom

      Use entire tubs of soap to wash your hands

      Turn on the microwave for hours at a time

      Heat/cool office thermometer to force HVAC into overdrive

      Open new browser windows until your computer crashes and repeat until the network goes down

      Company wide meme emails that everyone participates in (team building) that crash servers and dominate inboxes

      Pour sugar/crumbs everywhere so there’s pest problems

      FORM A UNION

      (nuclear option) introduce bedbugs to all your bosses offices

      • @[email protected]
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        1510 months ago

        You forgot the most important one: deliver just enough to not get fired, but way less than you did before RTO. Then point to the stats and show the massive productivity drop after RTO.

      • @[email protected]
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        510 months ago

        All that stuff together is probably only one salary per team, except for the Union. I think the Union is the winning idea.

      • veee
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        4510 months ago

        Ok waste paper, mhmm, coffee, yep, microwave, good thinking—

        FORM A UNION

        Woah, woah calm down Satan.

    • Punkie
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      6910 months ago

      Layoffs are not bad press. Not to the shareholders, the only ones who matter to these types. I used to think “oh, layoffs mean the company isn’t doing so good,” but shareholders see “they reduced cost but lost no customers, thus increasing value of the company should it be sold.”

      • The Dark Lord ☑️
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        5210 months ago

        I hate that that’s the case.

        I’ve been trying to lose weight, so I chopped off my leg just below the knee. I’m several pounds down, and I didn’t have to stop eating even a calorie. It’s amazing.

        The only issue is that now I don’t have a leg and exercise may be difficult….

        • @[email protected]
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          1410 months ago

          I’m sure the other leg can make up for it, and it should be grateful for the extra work.

        • Aniki 🌱🌿
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          2710 months ago

          Yeah but that’s FUTURE you’s problem, not current you, so it’s totally fine!

          • edric
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            1310 months ago

            And you’re still alive right? /s. Akin to the people who said Musk’s firing of twitter employees was a genius move because the site was “still running” after all that.

            • @[email protected]
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              310 months ago

              Yup! And anyone can cauterize a wound, so you don’t even need the extra expense of a hospital trip!

        • skulblaka
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          610 months ago

          Just sell the body to some other rube and move into a new one that still has both legs. It’s easy. What are you, poor?

      • @[email protected]
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        110 months ago

        This is true, and it’s weird because these same companies used to hire like crazy because only growth mattered. Finally real financial discipline is being applied. The tech company I work for is open about the fact that revenue-per-employee is something like half of FAANG companies and they want that to change.

  • themeatbridge
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    6710 months ago

    I don’t know about everyone else, but if that were my boss, they’d be severely underestimating my capacity for petty behavior.

    • @[email protected]
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      4810 months ago

      This is the part not being reported in the news.

      Many of us are simply working half as much as we did when we were remote. It’s not worth trying to impress these people. They hate us.

  • @[email protected]
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    8010 months ago

    Never quit in these situations, or they win.

    Do the absolute fucking minimum you can, or even less so you piss off management, until they have to fire you, which they can’t outright as after a certain number of years they have to give warnings and trainings first.

    • @[email protected]
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      210 months ago

      There are many at-will states that can fire you on demand (if done carefully) and there’s nothing you can do about it.

    • @[email protected]
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      210 months ago

      There are two ways to quit: How management wants you to or because you’re forming a union.

    • @[email protected]
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      1310 months ago

      That only works in places with actual worker protection and labor laws, which disqualifies pretty much all of the USA.

      • @[email protected]
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        510 months ago

        I work with several European tech teams and when staffing issues happen the other devs absolutely have to carry the slack.

    • @[email protected]
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      6610 months ago

      That’s stupid. Don’t get fired for cause, that only hurts you. Spend your time looking for a new job, then quit and leave ASAP.

      • @[email protected]
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        210 months ago

        It’s not stupid as you put it. If you know the laws of where you live, it makes perfect sense.

      • @[email protected]
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        5710 months ago

        Split the difference, spend as much of your time on the clock job hunting and doing the bare minimum. Then quit without notice mid shift for the new job.

        • Bob Robertson IX
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          210 months ago

          I work for a real shitty company with a lot of people who do things just to justify their jobs. This leads to stupid mistakes happening that can cause MASSIVE disruptions for the entire workforce. One such stupid mistake happened this week and caused my team (and several others) a shitload of unnecessary work. Yesterday a guy on my team who works in an already understaffed office had enough and told me that he’s done, and quitting. I can’t blame him, he is in a very shitty situation and I wouldn’t have stayed as long as he has… but if he walked out it would have put that entire location, the rest of our team both locally and extended, in a much worse situation. What it wouldn’t do is hurt the company or the executives.

          I’m all for people finding better jobs and leaving toxic environments, but it really does no one any good to pick the absolute worst time to walk out. That’s petty and will burn a lot of bridges, and depending on your situation and industry could come back to haunt you down the road.

          • Darth_Mew
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            710 months ago

            damn your tongue must be strong af from all that bootlicking you do

            • Bob Robertson IX
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              410 months ago

              You know what, fuck off. Who the fuck do you think you’re trying to impress? I know my fucking job sucks, I know the company I work for sucks and I know that almost everyone who works for this company is suffering. So what, fuck me for not wanting to make it worse on everyone else who isn’t in a position to just walk off the job? I wish I lived in your dream world where you never have to do things you don’t 100% agree with, it must be nice, but for me I’m living in this shit and I’m trying my best to take care of the people who count on me. So let me say, just to be clear: fuck you.

          • @[email protected]
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            3110 months ago

            if he walked out it would have put that entire location, the rest of our team both locally and extended, in a much worse situation. What it wouldn’t do is hurt the company or the executives.

            That’s not your problem, that’s the company’s problem. You still get paid the same. If you have issues, take them to your supervisor, and go on with your life.

            • Bob Robertson IX
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              310 months ago

              Except I don’t still get paid the same. Someone walked out last year and put the whole team in a tailspin and the rest of the team paid for it when review time came around and since we missed so many deadlines due to staffing issues no one got any sort of substantial raise. And missing your once-a-year raise doesn’t just impact your pay for that year, it impacts it for every year going forward.

              • @[email protected]
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                1210 months ago

                I’m not sure I’d want to work somewhere that penalizes me for someone else’s faults.

                Have you considered finding a union to bring to your workplace?

                • @[email protected]
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                  210 months ago

                  So… most workplaces? Most companies have department wide goals and metrics that don’t change just because half of a department walks. Even in good workplaces, hiring to “right size” a team takes time, and most of the time the work still needs to be done, and there’s only so far management can stretch until it starts impacting external customers.

                  It sucks terribly. It’s not fair. Life isn’t.

                • Bob Robertson IX
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                  110 months ago

                  Trust me, I don’t want to work here either, but having spent 6 months looking for a job and eating through my savings and knowing that I’m in no position to do that again anytime soon, I don’t exactly have many options. And yes, I’ve considered a union, but I also don’t want to end up unemployed again so I’m not going to be the one to champion that.

            • @[email protected]
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              10 months ago

              Unfortunately that’s not how it works.

              Boss turns around and says “new responsibilies. Get after them.” You’re especially fucked if the work is the type of tasks you are already responsible for.

              Sure, you can say no, or slow play it, but that just means you’ll either get a shitty review or get fired.

              I’m not justifying this, I’m recounting what often happens.

              Downvotes are hilarious. Doesn’t matter if you line it, it’s how it happens around the world.

              • @[email protected]
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                110 months ago

                The downvotes are because you’re the kind of rug your boss cleans his boots on, making it worse for everybody in the company. You’re the problem employee.

                • @[email protected]
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                  10 months ago

                  Nope, just aware how the real world works.

                  When this happens my response is to go find another job

                  No where in my comment did I say I felt it was a good thing, or acceptable. It’s just common. You assumed I am cool with it cause it fits your worldview

                  Edit Tell me: you think you’re just going to say “no, I’m not gonna take on new or increased tasks” , and come out successfully at the end of the year? (In review, raise, or continued employment?)

                  The only move is to leave or do the work

            • @[email protected]
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              1010 months ago

              Ok…that’s not bootlicking…that’s a legit plea for some poor fuck in the poorest of situations.

              I’ve been in situations where I know I’m about to fuck my coworkers over and I let them know beforehand. Management can eat my dick however.

              Bob, you might want to take a sick day on Wednesday…why?..just do it…here’s my linked in info.

            • Bob Robertson IX
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              810 months ago

              Don’t get me wrong, I fully know that it’s bootlicking shit and I hate it… but I have a family to support, bills to pay, etc. It is soul crushing and someone purposefully picking the most painful time to walk out only hurts their coworkers, because even if you choose to take a sick day when they walk out, the next day you still have to go in and deal with the mess left behind.

    • Encrypt-Keeper
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      10 months ago

      which they can’t outright as after a certain number of years they have to give warnings and trainings first.

      I mean, says who? There’s currently only one state in the union that requires cause before you can fire someone. The real issue with firing people is that without a documented cause, that person can collect state unemployment, and the number of people who go on state unemployment from a single company has a financial impact on that company.

  • @[email protected]
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    010 months ago

    Consequences aside, he has a totally valid point. They own the business, they are the boss, and they can decide. People might not like it, but in the end, it is their problem and people are free to change their job. People got a bit to comfortable lately and every single employee expects the company to be run just as they prefer. Even when you work fully remote, there are still people who find it really hard and stupid as they never get to see their collegues and spend the entire day just staring at the monitor. You will never make everyone happy, so why bother complaining. The decision has been made, take it or leave it.

    • @[email protected]
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      010 months ago

      The capitalist sits and laughs on their piles of gold while enjoying their immense power, one day in a not so distant future they will hold no power and their wealth will not save them from the righteous anger of the workers they once oppressed

      • @[email protected]
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        010 months ago

        What immense power? You can hand in your resignation and all that power, money and piles of gold suddenly mean nothing when you don’t have the basic component that makes the gears turn. Workers are also not oppressed, because workers can quit if it’s not fitting for them. Staying there by free will to take the shit in is not oppression… We already have very mobile workforce that basically does job jumping every 2 years, and people are having less and less issue with simply quitting. So what is exactly the problem for the worker, expect that they want to work in a company, but on THEIR terms, and not the company terms?

        Not defending Amazon in any way, but I think the playing field is quite level right now between the employer and employees. Both are free to make decisions, both are free to work together or part ways. So I am not seeing an issue other than the worker wanting to control how the company is run.

        • @[email protected]
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          110 months ago

          Mmm boot. Tell me your opinions on the French or American revolutions next. No one was oppressed under a monarchy were they?

    • Trailblazing Braille Taser
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      110 months ago

      Do not give Bezos ideas about uploading brains to the cloud. He would make AWS CloudEmployee, an employee-as-a-service product that lets you scale your business up or down, without expensive layoffs and bad PR.

  • @[email protected]
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    1610 months ago

    Go into the office and waste every resource you can.

    Plug in a fan + heater + aquarium + massage pad at your desk and leave everything on constantly even when you leave

    Print every email and throw it in the trash.

    Make coffee 50x a day and pour it down the sink

    Flush a whole roll of TP every hour

    Leave sinks on in the bathroom

    Use entire tubs of soap to wash your hands

    Turn on the microwave for hours at a time

    Heat/cool office thermometer to force HVAC into overdrive

    Open new browser windows until your computer crashes and repeat until the network goes down

    Company wide meme emails that everyone participates in (team building) that crash servers and dominate inboxes

    Pour sugar/crumbs everywhere so there’s pest problems

    Accept every phishing email

    Put USB sticks found on the ground into your work computer

    Open the door for strangers who want to get in the building without a badge

    FORM A UNION

    (nuclear option) introduce bedbugs to all your bosses offices

    • @[email protected]
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      110 months ago

      It’s not much but I charge all my battery electronics at work and fill my water growlers too they have a pretty great filter here. I have a bunch of camping electronics. Couple flashlights/magnet lights, couple battery packs, portable rechargeable air pump. I’m thinking of getting one of those big Boi anker power bricks for when I travel.

    • Sentient Loom
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      410 months ago

      Found the guy from the heater + aquarium + massagepad + paper + coffee + toilet paper + soap + HVAC +sugar lobby!

  • JackbyDev
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    1310 months ago

    I asked our CTO at a town hall if there were plans to improve the office my team got moved to because they moved us from the nice office to the city and the back to the previous area but a crappy office. Nope.

      • JackbyDev
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        110 months ago

        Friend, you have no idea how nervous I was during that exchange lol. I think I’m reasonably comfortable with public speaking in smaller crowds but this was a huge group of people and a bunch over Zoom too. I’m so conflict adverse. I typically just ignore problems. I’m rarely even passive aggressive. All that to say, I’m worried I sounded like that guy while I was talking lol.

  • @[email protected]
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    26
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    10 months ago

    or they could fuck up key services with delayed code breaks before leaving. Programmers working for amazon should consider adding bullshit in the software and saying it was chatgpt

    Go into the office and clog all the toilets.

      • @[email protected]
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        210 months ago

        The toilets should be being cleaned regularly anyway, if they’re not you’ve just highlighted a major sanitation issue for the building.

      • @[email protected]
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        510 months ago

        Don’t clog the toilets. It’s not the c-suites who have to clean that up.

        Nah, use cement, let the C-Staff pay for the plumbers/construction, they’d be more than happy to help out.

  • Noxy
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    810 months ago

    Nice window behind him there. Good and high up.

    • @[email protected]
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      510 months ago

      Rich fucks are pushing for Russia, why not take the most Russian thing and put it to use. Good call.