• themeatbridge
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    12521 days ago

    Knee pain. Everyone told me it was normal growing pains, until one little league coach notice I run weird. Queue years of doctors and specialists and tests and scans and surgeries, and now I’m a 40 something guy with advanced arthritis that could have been much much worse if left untreated.

      • themeatbridge
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        1220 days ago

        My parents took me to see doctors, who told them it was just growing pains and suggested I exercise more to lose weight. I saw three specialists and had a bunch of xrays before anyone noticed the shady spots on my cartilage. Osteochondritis Dissecans occurs in 15-30 people out of 100,000, and most of the primary care doctors I’ve had in my life had never heard of it.

        I can’t blame my parents for that. I can blame them for a lot of things, but they did their best.

  • Lux (it/they)
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    14721 days ago

    Homophobia

    I was raised in a right wing, rural area, and i didn’t meet a gay person til higschool. When he said he was gay, i assumed he was joking.

    Im trans now lol

      • Mike
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        921 days ago

        These must be the so called trans reading bed time stories turning kids gay i keep hearing so much about. /s

      • @TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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        2721 days ago

        if my grandma were to be believed my dad’s babysitter when he was 4 years old infected him with homosexuality then he passed it onto his children because one (me) is trans and the other is bisexual

        She’s not very harmful about it but is just really damn confused lol

        • @stelelor@lemmy.ca
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          1521 days ago

          So if I get this right, your dad turned homosexual from his babysitter… Then proceeded to have two, presumably biologic, kids?

          • @phlegmy@sh.itjust.works
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            1620 days ago

            Nah the dad was too strong to be brainwashed by the babysitter’s sexual deviance. But those poor baby sperm overhead everything and became infected with the gay.

          • @TriflingToad@sh.itjust.works
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            20 days ago

            presumably biologic kids

            Yeah, my dad fell for the “get a woman to protect you from same sex attraction” propaganda. Over the years he changed his mind and learned that it’s not something to be ashamed of, but he was in a relationship with kids now.

            when I came out and my mom was very verbally abusive he kinda had the realization that the relationship wasn’t benefiting the children either. Also my mom was very very controlling over who he could talk to/make friends with.

            He is currently in the process of a divorce after 22 years and is coming to terms with how he let fear control his life for that long.

            It’s kinda sad.

      • Scrubbles
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        3121 days ago

        There’s a reason cities are more liberal. Turns out being surrounded by different cultures, races, sexualities, and beliefs shows you that maybe they’re not so different. In a town of 15k middle American white folks, it’s hard to see another culture equally, let alone at all.

        Same thing with college. There’s no such thing as a liberal or democratic college. It’s just that people are simply surrounded by other people. You learn all of those weird rules and things you were taught don’t actually hold up, and that everyone is kind of the same

    • Angry_Autist (he/him)
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      420 days ago

      Grew up semi-rural south and same thing but my parents took me to see The Birdhouse for some reason (I was 14) and I was like “OH!”

      Not gay myself, but thankfully I did not grow up to be the bigoted person my parents wanted me to be.

  • @dingus@lemmy.world
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    14021 days ago

    I remember one day realizing it was odd that my dad would hug my mom but my mom would never hug him back. She would just stand there and let him hug her. Yeah he was an abusive husband and I was very happy for her when she finally left him after over a decade!

  • @notanapple@lemm.ee
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    19 days ago

    Having a constant noise in your head/ears. It was so normal to me I didnt question it for many years. I randomly asked my friends about it one day and found out most people actually dont have an old crt tv like noise in their ears (and that its the disorder tinnitus).

    In my case its not very severe thankfully, I dont notice it unless Im in a silent room or Im actively thinking about it.

  • @arararagi@ani.social
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    4520 days ago

    Taking multiple shits every day, after a friend pointed it out that wasn’t normal I did a lactose test and found out I’ve been lactose intolerant all my life.

  • @waz@lemmy.world
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    6220 days ago

    This was a really recent realization for me. I am one of the people who can voluntarily activate the tensor tympani muscles in my ears to create a low level rumbling sound. I recently tried explaining this to someone else and they still think I am making it up.

  • 2ugly2live
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    3220 days ago
    • “Maladaptive Daydreaming”
    • I have an issue with being remembered in person (at least that’s what my therapist said). I will go to different chains of the same store on rotation, or stop going to a store all together if they remember me “too much.” I’ll wait until shift changes or that it’s been long enough that they’ve forgotten about me. I’ve stopped going to certain places all together if there’s no alternatives. Outside of lemmy, I have no social media. I don’t want anyone to ever be able to look me up. Apparently people don’t do that.
    • Using different cutlery based off of meal size/how long you want to savor something (ex: You like ice cream, so you may eat it with a smaller spoon so it lasts longer.).
    • Wondering what people were thinking/picturing when they bought their clothes (not in a “wow, that’s ugly, what were they thinking” but what they saw themselves as. Did they see this suit and think of themselves as a ceo? Did she buy thay dress and imagine the places she’ll wear it? That sort of thing).
    • Having multiple paths to one place. I could get to my classes or office multiple ways. I would rotate, take these stairs one day, this elevator the next, etc.
    • I believed everyone had some kind of food that would give them the boo-boos. I’m actually just lactose intolerant.
  • Horsey
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    20 days ago

    Child abuse. I thought it was normal to threaten children with violence for noncompliance. I thought it was normal to be afraid to misbehave or be suboptimal in school at the threat of violence.

  • @letsgo@lemm.ee
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    1420 days ago

    Limited joint range. I just thought that’s as far as they went. It still freaks me out slightly when I see people using a normal range, as if they’d just turned their heads through 360° or bent their knees the wrong way.

  • @superkret@feddit.org
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    11321 days ago

    Getting locked in the basement without water, or thrown out into the streets for half a day, when you misbehaved as a child.

    • @tetris11@lemmy.ml
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      521 days ago

      I mean, yeah? Is that really so bad. I guess it depends what the intent was. The town I grew up in was pretty tame, and the room I’d get locked in without food or water if I’d misbehaved had books

      • @MoonlightFox@lemmy.world
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        3621 days ago

        I was locked outside of the house for long periods of time and had to drink from the garden hose / garden faucet, and pee in the bushes. We also had like 10+ apple trees. It wasn’t that bad. A bit boring sometimes.

        But that’s because it was outside and I could get my needs covered and meet friends.

        Locked inside without these needs covered for extended periods is a lot worse in my opinion. Even cats and dogs have those needs covered.

        It’s also about the lack of freedom when locked inside.

        I would not treat my own children like I was treated, and especially not like you were.

        • @tetris11@lemmy.ml
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          21 days ago

          Yeah, I just remember it being boring too. I’m also not really a person who can’t go a few hours without water, so I never felt I was being neglected.

          I dont think I’d lock my kid indoors, but I do admit that when it happened to me after I’d been fighting my siblings or something, it was just treated as a time where I would chill out and read a book to wind down. Once dinner was ready, I’d get called for dinner, and everything seemed normal.

          So I’d probably try to create a cool down zone with my kids if I ever have them, maybe a comfy chair they’re not allowed to leave for a few hours?

          • @Paper_Phrog@lemmy.world
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            2421 days ago

            Children (humans) should always have access to clean water. That is not normal in the slightest. A time out shouldn’t include torture.

            • @thebestaquaman@lemmy.world
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              721 days ago

              I agree that “people should have access to clean water”. Let’s not confuse sending a child to their room to wind down when they’re throwing a fit with torture.

              No one takes harm from lack of water in a mild climate over the course of a couple hours. The reason it’s bad to lock a kid in the basement (or any other room) is that you’re taking away their freedom (which may be, to some point, justified and correct) and potentially making it harder for them to trust you. However, kids also need to learn that there are limits to how you can behave, and consequences for breaking those limits. Where the limit between “reasonable consequences for teaching children” and “trust-breaking punishment” lies is a fair discussion to have. No need to pull “locking a kid in their room is torture” into it.

              • @Rekorse@sh.itjust.works
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                620 days ago

                I don’t think it counts as locking them away without food or water if they don’t become thirsty or hungry while grounded. Grounding my son for an hour, technically he has no water or food, but if he asked for it I’d give it to him.

                • @thebestaquaman@lemmy.world
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                  219 days ago

                  Exactly “locking away without food or water” makes it sound like the time perspective we’re talking about is long enough that access to food and water are necessary within that time span.

                  I would say you should never lock away a kid for so long that they need access to food and water at all.

              • @Paper_Phrog@lemmy.world
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                320 days ago

                No, that’s mostly fair, and it wasn’t my point to state that sending a kid to their room equals torture. But I hope you can understand that witholding water is not a good thing, ever. Kids might not express (or fleven feel) the thirst. And that can definitely be a bad thing. Take into account possible emotions that involve crying or just warm weather etc. and they could easily get dehydrated. Losing just a few % of bodyweight water can be negatively impacting already.

                • @thebestaquaman@lemmy.world
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                  219 days ago

                  We seem to agree here: I’m by no means advocating that you should ever explicitly withhold water from a thirsty kid. I just think a lot of people here have gone over-the-top regarding how horrible it is to send a kid to their room without putting a bottle of water in there first. It’s not like feeling thirsty for a bit or getting slightly dehydrated is in any way detrimental to anyone’s health. People get thirsty and lightly dehydrated all the time, either on hiking trips or because they forgot to bring water for something that lasts a while.

                  The important thing, as I see it, is that you never put the kid in a situation where they honestly begin to doubt whether you care about their well-being and are going to look after them.

        • @tetris11@lemmy.ml
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          321 days ago

          half a day seems like peanuts though – though I guess it really does depend how the kid feels about it

          • @its_prolly_fine@sh.itjust.works
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            21 days ago

            Dude no! Like a 15 minute time out is ok. But if they ask for water they should be given it. Locked away alone in a room without supervision for hours? No. That is not normal. At all.

            • @SorteKanin@feddit.dk
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              1221 days ago

              Like a 15 minute time out is ok.

              Locked in a room or locked out of the house? That is not okay, regardless of how long it is.

                • @SorteKanin@feddit.dk
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                  120 days ago

                  Tbh I think even such a thing is not that great for children. Certainly not traumatic or close to it, but just not very effective I would guess.

      • @tomi000@lemmy.world
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        621 days ago

        The only acceptable intent would be something like saving your child from a murderer assaulting your family and there not being enough time for supplies.

      • @shottymcb@lemm.ee
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        320 days ago

        Average lemmy.ml user be like:

        I mean, yeah? Is that really so bad. I guess it depends what the intent was. The town I grew up in was pretty tame, and the room I’d get locked in without food or water if I’d misbehaved had books

    • Lena
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      219 days ago

      If I may ask, where are you from?

  • @ikidd@lemmy.world
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    1021 days ago

    That not everyone cracked their head open as a kid. I just assumed everyone has had stitches in their forehead until I was in my twenties, everyone I knew had some sort of scar like that.