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ZeroCool to The [email protected]English • 1 day ago

RFK Jr. Announces Plans to Live Forever After Stuffing His Holes with Silica Gel Packets

thehardtimes.net

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RFK Jr. Announces Plans to Live Forever After Stuffing His Holes with Silica Gel Packets

thehardtimes.net

ZeroCool to The [email protected]English • 1 day ago
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Secretary of Health Robert F. Kennedy Jr. today declared his plans to live for eternity after stuffing his orifices with silica gel packets.
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  • Øπ3ŕ
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    3•4 hours ago

    …wish a motherfucker would.

  • @[email protected]
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    4•12 hours ago

    Since the ivermectin didn’t kill him, can we push the narrative that injecting a gram of botox will make him live a lot longer?

  • @[email protected]
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    50•1 day ago

    Looking forward to seeing this exact headline on NotTheOnion in a few months.

    • @[email protected]
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      8•18 hours ago

      Glad I wasn’t the only one.

  • LousyCornMuffins
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    2•17 hours ago

    Bing!-wait, satire? Dammit I was gonna win

  • @[email protected]
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    14•24 hours ago

    Ya gotta be careful in today’s world. I half read the title and assumed it was real. Almost ate the onion on this one

  • @[email protected]
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    17•1 day ago

    You have to check for the onion now.

    In the before before time we didn’t have empty ball sacks in charge of aspirin. Even less the FDA.

  • @[email protected]
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    8•23 hours ago

    IIRC, silica gel beads enlarge when they absorb water.

    • @[email protected]
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      6•19 hours ago

      I think that’s the plan, lol

  • massive_bereavement
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    3•1 day ago

    A Fool proof strategy.

  • @[email protected]
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    2•1 day ago

    https://youtu.be/ChgIkbg0x80

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