My dog’s GPS tracker fell off of her collar.

Ironically, I can’t use the GPS tracking app to find the GPS tracker.

All it tells me is “it’s somewhere in your house or yard.”

The last time I smiled was on August 19th, 1991. I wear a dirty ushanka at all times, do not shave, and only take cold sponge baths because hot running water is bourgeoisie decadence. Every day at exactly noon I have the same meal of an expired Maoist MRE I store in a pit covered in old issues of a revolutionary newspaper. I sleep in a bed made of flags from every failed revolution so that they are never forgotten. In the evenings I stare at a picture of vodka by candlelight, but I do not allow myself to drink because there is nothing to celebrate. Every local org has banned me after I attempted to split it by assassinating the leadership. There is no plumbing in my house I shit in a brass bucket with a picture of Gonzalo and Deng french kissing in the bottom of it. My house is actually an overturned T34 in an abandoned junkyard in Wisconsin. I have a single friend in this world and it is a tapeworm named Bordiga that I met after ingesting spoiled borscht on 9/11 in the ruins of building 7 (I blew it up after finding that a nominally leftist NGO inside of it wasn’t sufficiently anti-imperialist, the attacks on the world trade center were a perfect revolutionary moment for me to enact direct praxis against liberalism). My source of income is various MLM schemes in the former soviet bloc that have been running for so long no one remembers who I am, they just keep sending money. I have not paid taxes since McGovern lost the Democratic nomination for president and my faith in electoralism died more brutally than my childhood dog after it got into an entire jar of tylenol. I own 29 fully automatic rusted kalashnikovs and three crates of ammunition entirely incompatible with them or any other firearms I own. My double PHD in marxist economics and 18th century Swiss philosophy (required to understand Engels) sits over the fireplace of my home, my fireplace is a salvaged drum from a 1950s washing machine that was recalled for locking children inside of it. I chose that washing machine model on purpose because I am anti-natalist. During the latest BLM protests I firebombed a Nikes outlet in the middle of a peaceful candlelit vigil. William F Buckley and I wrote hatemail to one another for 47 years until my final letter gave him an aneurysm. The only water I drink is from puddles. George Lucas and I dropped acid together during an MKULTRA southern baptist summer camp and he went on to write the movie Willow about our time together. The best way to test whether an electrical wire is live is to drool on it and shrimp salad is racist. You can make an IED out of potassium and the instructions are online thanks to Timothy McVey, who was actually a committed antifascist communist slandered by the deep state as part of operation condor. Every time a liberal files a restraining order against me, I carve a mark into the wall. I am running out of walls. When Amerika finally collapses I will be ready to lead the revolution. I am very smart and people like being around me.

So the thing about this is that, even if the things wealthy people can deduct means that they rarely pay the 90% marginal tax in practice, the fact that the government is using the tax code to coerce them into doing certain things instead of hoarding their money is still massively beneficial. The current regime abdicates a tremendous degree of the government’s ability to tell the rich what to do with their money, and that is a major contributor to our society’s seeming paralysis with respect to doing things.

Look at this majestic creature!

And this handsome kitty I met at the vet’s office.

I love my dog. She’s injured right now but healing, so I’m looking forward to her vet visit next week where she’ll hopefully get her bandages removed for the last time and we can go for walks again. I’m so happy to have this animal in my life, legitimately the best year of my life was when I got her.

Woulda been funny if they put it in as an instant lose condition, like with that one asari in mass effect.

Maybe the Dark Side really is stronger, and Yoda was lying to Luke that one time he said it wasn’t.

Come to think of it, in JK3: Jedi Academy, the Dark Side Rage force power is practically an instant win button.

I’ve always liked the explanation that all of the competent Jedi were out on missions, so the crew that went to Geonosis were all the librarians, schoolteachers, and HR managers who happened to be at the temple when Mace Windu and Yoda decided to go save Obi Wan. Like cops who’ve been at their desks for twenty years, they’d barely maintained their lightsaber certifications and weren’t ready for an actual fight.

Plus, when they whipped out their lightsabers the Geonosians all fled - Mace Windu probably expected that to be the whole mission, they intimidate the Geonosians, get the captives released, and leave. Dooku pulling the droids out of hiding was a trap.

Yeah it’s a classroom lead by Yoda where they’re blocking the training remote shots. But that lesson is about teaching a force user to trust in their sixth sense, not about teaching them how to kill hundreds of people with a beam of hot plasma.

There’s a divide between Obi Wan’s generation, which learned the diplomat stuff first and the combat stuff second, and Asoka’s generation, which learned the opposite, is what I’m saying.

I was gonna defend Adult Swim but then I realized that they haven’t had anything I’ve liked in almost ten years so

I think most of their training isn’t actually combat related, they just get regular schooling along with Jedi indoctrination.

During the Clone Wars things got screwed up, because all of the desk jockey Jedi were killed on Geonosis.

yo I’m only thirty three why the fuck do I have grey hairs in my beard!?

finally bought crosscode cuz of the summer sale. maybe I’ll finally learn what those emotes are all about.

I miss a slide out landscape keyboard - but even Swype I feel like has gotten worse with time. I just can’t shake the feeling when I use it that I spend half my time or more deleting and trying again to get the words I want.

Smartphones. I used to have a Droid 4 with the slide out landscape keyboard, and that was peak mobile computing. I don’t care if Swype is better than it used to be, it’s no replacement for physical buttons - whenever I type anything more than a couple words long on my phone I spend like half the time deleting and retrying when it guesses the wrong word. Never had that problem typing with my thumbs.

Also, physical buttons make emulation doable on a phone in a way that on screen buttons and keyboards do not. Back when I had a physical keyboard I played games on my phone all the goddamn time - now I basically only use it as a web browser, because any other use case is painful in comparison.

I’m glad some qwerty phones are making a comeback, but they’re all in the portrait orientation which has always felt way too cramped to me. A Droid 4 with a modern screen/battery/processor would be my dream device.

I’ll accept this as a compromise between reality and my actual position, 100% expropriation of wealth for every kkkrakkker.

600,000 people die of malaria every year

Yeah but what countries are they from. The ones with money do not care about them.

edit: actually now that I think about it they probably wouldn’t care if they were Americans either considering how we handled covid.

Westerners practically froth at the mouth to talk about the mistakes made under Mao, but even with those mistakes the end result of his term was that the Chinese population’s lifespan doubled. Not a lot of world leaders can claim anything like that level of success.

I suggest a counter-scam. “I’m interested in your offer but first I need to see a credit report from this specific website…”

Operation Al-Aqsa Flood came after fifteen years of Gaza being besieged by the IDF. Yes civilians died in it and that’s tragic, but Hamas did not create the conditions under which the operation occurred, Israel did. Hamas does not have the power and the international backing to end this conflict, Israel does. Hamas has not spent seven and a half decades ethnically cleansing Israelis - Israel has spent that time ethnically cleansing Palestinians.

Anything short of support for Hamas is support for genocide.